Daring to be Dauntless (A Divergent Fanfiction)

Chapter 7- Simulations

“Alright, moving on-- next on the agenda is a physical and mental exam; this exam is what we call a simulation. Yes, I’m sure you are already familiar with the fear simulations Dauntless use in their initiation but this one is different. This simulation is to put you in a position where you must deem the most logical solution rather than face your fears.” I knot my hands behind my back and pace the floor before the lab tables, where the transfers sit.
“Every one of you will be observed by me and at the end I will send your results to a grading system where they will be examined for three things: One- Demonstration, Two- Reasoning, and Three- Relevance.”
All of them stare at me. I pucker my lips. “Am I understood?”
They all nod.
“Well then, who wants to start us off?”
It almost seems like they all take a step back. I step closer.
“I understand that this is not Dauntless and we don’t expect bravery, but you will find no matter where you are that you cannot give in to cowardice.”
This seems to have worked because the first person to step up is Caleb. I nod to him and allow him to lead the way out of the room. I make sure to lock the door behind me-- locking the initiates in the room. Half way down the hallway I turn around and as expected, Ben is leaning against the door smiling at me. I'd mentioned to him that this group of initiates tended to be more rowdy, especially with a stiff sitting next to them. I give him a short nod and take Caleb to a room with no windows. A counter with serum samples, tubes and scattered wires over the top rests at the back of the room.

I always hated this place, whether because of Jeanine getting insight into my fears when putting me through my first fear simulation as a test run for Dauntless, or to see how I hold myself in a situation, it always pained me.
“Take a seat,” I say. I remove a tube with clear liquid from a cabinet on the back wall. I insert the tube into an injection needle. Caleb’s eyes follow me around the room until I finally sit in the chair next to him. His hands I can't help but notice are shaking, and all the hair on his arms are standing up. He must feel so stripped down without those grey heavy robes Abnegation wears. He wears a blue polo shirt and blue jeans.
I gently lay my hand on his arm, syringe in hand and I walk him through it.
“I’ll insert this here,” I gently tap with my index finger the point of injection. “You will be awake for about sixty seconds then you will enter into a simulation where you will be compelled to choose an option, whether it logical or stupid is entirely dependent on you.”
He nods.
“Ready?” I ask.
“I don’t have a choice do I?” He pinches his lips.
I look at him, sarcasm eroding through the “Jeanine’s double mask” I made for myself. “Nope, so I guess you’ll just have to suck it up.”
I push the plunger and the liquid empties into his vein. He looks at me with big eyes and I stand up, leaving him to receive two red wires.
I gently press one of the suction cups with the needle in its center onto the side of his neck, right under his ear. He winces.
I press another to his forehead. He groans and reaches for the wires. I catch him and slap his hand away.
“It’ll hurt more if you try to remove it.”
He groans again and shuts his eyes. I check his pulse. He’s entering. I turn on a box on the counter and hook his wires and my own to the machine. It beeps and when I close my eyes I am there. At first we’re in Erudite and then the scene blurs and we skip to Abnegation. There’s Dauntless lining the streets, grey bodies spread around the street. At first he freezes. He still wears his blue clothing, still a symbol of Erudite. The black clothed soldiers walk around, zombies in their own skin. Our creations. One with glossed over eyes marches up, gun slung over his shoulder and begins to talk.
“We found no Divergent sir.”
Caleb looks around and moves forward. He’s still reasonable about the distance between him and the soldier but his comfort zone is fading. “Are you looking for them?” He asks. Obviously he knows what the divergent are. 
As I look into the scene I notice something moving behind a building. I remember that dark hair and that tall, built structure anywhere. Tobias. He’s being followed by a young girl, only about sixteen and I realize, my imagination is forming with his, because there is no way on earth I imagined this girl with my cousin. He grips her hand tightly and eases out of the shadows.
For a brief second I believe he is going to run and then he stops and looks right at Caleb. Well technically, the girl stopped him to look at Caleb. I remember her now and I watch dumbstruck. Its Beatrice that is holding Tobias’s hand…and that is a problem.
Caleb’s eyes shift to them, to their hands intertwined. For a moment they are frozen, staring at each other until the Dauntless soldier turns and spots them. A whistle sounds from somewhere and Tobias and Beatrice run from behind the building and towards the railroad tracks.
A few Dauntless run after them but a few others stay, staring at Caleb. “Where do we go sir?” one asks.
Caleb looks around. I can tell there is some apprehension to lead but then there is also a want.
“Follow me.”
He runs off, to the left of where Tobias and Beatrice ran. My mind automatically follows to where he is and I see his plan. He bursts through bushes and stampedes around other black clothed zombies and stops short at a building-- the building they would have to pass to get to the train.

My heart skips beats as I can mentally count the seconds it will take for Tobias to reach the building and for them to be caught.
Caleb pulls up short just as Tobias rounds the corner. He stops, his eyes tired and his face deadpan. Tobias pulls something from the waist of his pants. He holds the gun to Caleb’s head. Somehow the Dauntless that had been following Caleb just vanished.
“Wait!” Caleb says trembling. “My sister, I just want to see my sister.”
Tobias narrows his eyes but Beatrice runs up and pushes the gun away, shooting him a look.
“Caleb,” she smiles as she wraps him in her arms. She stands on her tiptoes but he hugs her so tightly he lifts her off the ground.
“Beatrice,” He mimics. He looks up at Tobias who is looking hard. “What are you doing with my sister?”
“Nothing,” Tobias says firmly.
“No? Holding hands, what is that supposed to be?” He lifts Beatrice’s hand. 
“Caleb…” Beatrice soothes. They look at each other for a second and then Beatrice pulls away to go hold Tobias’s hand. I’m hating her more by the second.
“Bea…” Caleb tries again.
She shakes her head. “Four and I are together…he will take care of me. Please Caleb, I’m begging you…let us go.” I narrow my eyes to slits. 

Caleb looks at his hands and then back up to them. “Go.” He mumbles. Just like that Tobias and Beatrice were past Caleb walking briskly towards the train. If I could slap Caleb now I would.
I can feel his heart race pick up, the temperature of his body escalate and then he picks something up, a small silver whistle. He looks at it and back to Tobias. He lifts it to his mouth and the whistle sounds. Tobias and Beatrice spin around quickly. Tobias has already removed his gun again and this time, bullets fire. Tobias looks at his gun and then to Beatrice. She screams and drops to her knees, catching him in his fall. Black bodies pass Caleb. 
Tobias grips onto her shoulders, pulling Beatrice's small body with him into the grass. She screams louder as dauntless soldiers run up to them. They drag her away, pinning her arms behind her back and dragging her away from Tobias’s lifeless body. I almost wish I'd been allowed a weapon too, just not to take care of Tobias. 

It’s finished. Caleb’s eyes spring open and I stand up. His knuckles are white from gripping the arms of the chair. He has tears in his eyes and the heart monitor has sped up.
“Take a minute and calm down,” I tell him as I remove the wires and tubes.
He breathes deep, making heavy and painful noises. “I killed him, I killed that boy.”
“Dauntless killed Four, not you.”
“I blew the whistle, I basically murdered him.”
I shake my head. “I’m deleting the footage.”
“Why?” He asks quickly.
“Because, you failed Caleb… your reason for blowing the whistle wasn’t relevant, it was for revenge, not to capture them. Your demonstration wasn’t bad, but it could have been better.” I lower my voice. “If Jeanine see’s that you are failing, this won’t be good for you Stiff.”
His chest pumps in and out and I help him up from the chair. “Lift your head up and act like nothing happened."
He nods and exits.
I shut the door quietly and walk to the counter. I take a slip of paper from one of the files and grab a pen. I jot some mental notes down. The most important: Keep an eye on Prior.

The rest of the day goes by, little action besides that of the morning. I hid the paper in my bra strap, where no one would think to look. I smiled even at my own cleverness.
“Hey Ri” the husky brown haired boy says walking up.
“Hey Benji.”
He groans. “Really Benji?”
I laugh. “Yes, really.”
He rolls his eyes and throws one arm around my shoulder. “So I heard the Stiff was the first to take the simulation today.”
I twitch. Remembering Tobias’s face pained me. “And where’d you hear that?”
He shrugs.
“I know people.”
We both laugh and stop in front of the cafeteria doors. “You heard from Hazel, didn’t you?” Hazel is one of the most stuck-up Erudite I have ever met. You can never hide anything from her.
Did I mention she was number five girlfriend to Caine? No? Well I am telling now.
I can’t even keep up with all the brat girlfriends he picks up.
“Well you know, she was talking about how stiff was being brave,” he says.
“That’s not so good,” I mumble. I chomp down on my bottom lip. “Listen, don’t tell anyone else about that alright?”
“Yeah,” he says nodding.

Ben and I walk into the cafeteria together and end up sitting at the same table. “So how did he do?” Ben says hunching his shoulders and dropping his voice to under a whisper.
I bite into a piece of bread and chew on it. It takes me a second to answer. “He did fine,” I say.
“That’s it?”
“You think there’s more?”
He gives me a look. “I was just checking, because you seem a little different, you know, after the simulations.”
“I’m fine,” I say reluctantly. Never have I been fine and never will I be, but no one thought to ask then.
We eat in silence until I stand up and move towards the initiates. “If you’ll follow me.”
They all stand up like little robots and follow.
I leave Ben sitting there, half his teeth sunk into an apple-- knowing, that I could never be Candor.