23. Bailey

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Our principal, Mr. Greenwood, is on the front the stage. After announcing all our names, with only a tiny slip-up when he realized Nick and I were actually together instead of with our dates, he makes a small speech about our impending graduation that no one, including myself, has any patience for.

"Well, I guess we'll move on then," he finally says after what feels like forever. I just want to be off this stage. Having Nick at my side helps, but I still feel like everyone's eyes are directly on me. I know it's only in my mind--there are nine other people on stage with me--but I can't control the panic it is causing me.

"And our 2018 Prom Queen is..." He unfolds a piece of loose leaf paper that I had been eyeing since I stepped out here and reads it painfully slowly "Well...there's no surprise here. Bailey Rogers!"

The gym erupts in applause but I can't move. It's not like I feel like this is some earth-shattering, life-changing, moment. I just physically can not move my feet.

Thankfully, the queen from last year walks to me before placing the crown on my head and handing me a large bouquet of flowers. "Just walk with me," she whispers and subtlety guides me to the front of the stage.

Once the microphone is in front of me, I snap out of my trance. "Thank you guys, so much!"

I give the former queen a thankful smile and take a few steps to the side, leaving room for Mr. Greenwood. He steps back to the center. "Congratulations, Ms. Rogers," he says, addressing me off to his left before turning his attention back to the crowd. "And now...our 2018 Prom King is..." he opens a second piece of paper. "Ian Rogers!"

Ian looks much more casual than I am sure I did stepping up to the microphone. He acts like he was made for this. "Thank you guys, really. This is awesome...But you're crazy if you think I'm dancing with my damn sister."

Everyone laughs, including Mr. Greenwood, and I hear a "Language!" coming from the back of the gym. I, however, am ready to strangle my brother.

I didn't want to dance with him either, but as he is grabbing Amanda's hand to walk to the middle of dance floor, I am painfully realizing that I am alone. I'm supposed to dance with the prom king, but he's my fucking brother. I can't go out and dance by myself.

Like I always knew he would, Nick gently grabs my hand from behind to walk with me to the large circle now forming around the center of the floor.

"Thank you," I whisper as we reach our destination and Nick swings around to place his hands on my waist. I wrap my arms around his neck as the beginning chords of "Can't Help Falling in Love" by Elvis Presley beginning playing.

Nick chuckles quietly to himself before saying. "This had to be your doing."

*Wise men say...only fools rush in*

I smile up at him, "The song?" And he nods.

*But I can't help...falling in love with you*

It's my favorite song of all time. I think the lyrics are perfection. I feel like I'm listening to poetry every time I hear it. I listened to it everyday for months when I first discovered it, and one of the perks of being on the Prom Committee is being able to pick the official song.

*Shall I stay?*

"Why do you say that? Do you know I like this song?" And Nick nods again.

*Would it be a sin?*

"Nick," I pause, "how do you know that?" It's not like I walk around reciting my favorite songs to people.

*If I can't help falling in love with you*

He shifts uncomfortably before staring at his shoes. "I heard you playing it in your room like every day. Ian's walls are right next to yours, you know?"

*Like a river flows...surely to the sea*

It still doesn't make sense. "Nick, that was like four years ago. How do you remember that?"

*Darling so it goes...Some things are meant to be*

When he looks at me again, I see it. How had I not seen it before? The look he is giving me is full of longing, wanting, and...sadness. Memories begin flooding into my mind. Nick at the hospital—You really have no idea, do you? Nick brushing my hair from my face as he thought I was sleeping after the night we spent on my floor. Ian drunkenly telling me that Nick had a crush on me—something I had completely forgotten about after the events with Nick's stepdad the next day.

And now he remembers my favorite song which I've never actually discussed with him. There's been so many little things that I've never noticed until now.

*Take my hand, take my whole life too*

How long has he had these feelings that I'm only now discovering?

*For I can't help falling in love with you*

Suddenly, every one else in the room vanishes. It is only Nick, and me. It's only his eyes on mine, and his thumb grazing the bare skin around my waist, and my fingers running along the back of his neck.

I take a small step toward him, so the front of our bodies are touching, and I hear a sharp intake of breath--I don't know if it was his or mine. I rest my head on his chest as I feel him wrap his arms tightly around my back. I can hear his heart beating through his shirt and feel his wrist against my shoulder blade.

This is all consuming, this feeling of togetherness. He could swallow me whole right now, or break me in half--I wouldn't care. In this moment, my world begins and ends with Nick. 

"Nick, what are you thinking?" As much as I want to just enjoy this feeling, I have to know, I had to ask if he's feeling the same things as me.

"God, Bailey, I don't even know," he's whispering, but I can hear the frustration in his words. "I want to say something perfect, something that will make this moment last, but I'm just so...so..."

"It's okay, Nick. You don't have to say anything." That told me everything I needed to know.

I back away slightly as I hear the song nearing it's end. I want to see his face. He's serious--there's not a hint of a smile to be found. But I am too.

My hands find their way to each side of his face, and I stand up straight, attempting to bring my lips closer to his--although he is still several inches taller than me, even in heels. I begin to lean in when I see the slightest shaking of his head. Oh right...we're in the middle of our prom surrounded by the entire student body. I had forgotten.

He releases his arms from me and takes a step backward. He's rejecting me...again. He's telling me he doesn't want to kiss me...again. Why does he care what they will think? Was I reading him wrong? Was the look that I interpreted as love...not?

Before I can say anything, Ian is by his side and my parents are rushing towards us. I put on my best fake smile and begin thanking everyone for their congratulations.


Stay tuned! Prom night is far from over! And please take a second to vote if you're liking it!

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