Stay With Me || Lashton ||

47

Ashton's POV

I've never been one that was good with goodbyes. So that's why when I told Luke goodnight last night, it wasn't just goodnight. I never told him what time my flight leaves this morning just to spare us both the painful airport goodbye. I didn't want him to deal with the pain of seeing me walking away to another world.

When my alarm clock went off this morning, I didn't want to go. The suitcases I have waiting by the door are weighted with everything from this chapter that I have to carry on to the next. Does that mean I have to leave Luke behind? Physically but never emotionally or mentally. I let my fingers grasp the guitar pick that rested on my chest, bringing it up to my lips to kiss it softly before letting it go. I've been ready to leave for about twenty minutes but I'm just trying to let everything that's familiar sink into my mind before I go.

The places where my posters were, where my drums sat perfectly in the corner and my desk where I wrote all those songs about Luke. I let my fingertips run across the wood, memorizing every groove and nick that littered the surface. I looked through my bedroom window to see Luke's blinds open but his room was still dark. I smiled at the memories of all the times I snuck in and out of that window without his mother knowing. My chest tightened at the memories too, with everything flooding my brain all at once.

Could I go without saying goodbye for real? I had to, that's what I always did. I sighed and grabbed up the remaining notebook from the desk to shove it in my backpack. I slung the stupid thing over my shoulder and turned to leave my room for the last time but Michael was standing in the doorway. I watched as a single tear escaped his eye and I tried my best not to unravel right there.

"No, don't you dare do that Mikey." I said but my voice cracked miserably.

"I'm just going to be lost without having to watch over your stupid ass." He joked in an attempt to lighten everything but I had to wipe away a tear.

"Am I doing the right thing Mikey?" I asked with my small voice. I was so anxious and terrified of the decision I had made but there really isn't any going back now.

"Yes Ashton you are." He said with a stern nod. I let out a humorless laugh and pulled him into a strong hug.

"I miss you already." I mumbled into Michael's shoulder and his grip on me tightened.

"I miss you too brother." He mumbled back and I felt the tears fill my eyes but I can't cry now.

"Knock it off Mikey, I didn't want to cry." I teased slapping his shoulder. We each grabbed a suitcase but Michael left the room to give me one last final goodbye.

My teary eyes scanned the room and I couldn't help but smile at the memories. What a crazy year. Definitely one that I will never ever forget. My eyes found the window to glance at Luke's window one last time before I closed the door behind me. I rested my back against the wood to steady myself and gather my emotions before I walked down the stairs. Mentally I said a goodbye to the house that I called home and all the memories I made with the lads here.

Karen and Michael were loading the trunk if Michael's car with my belongings when I approached them. I shoved the suitcase into the trunk and slammed it shut. My hand rested against the car for a moment as I glanced around at all the familiar houses. Just as I was looking towards Calum's house, I saw him walking across the street towards us. I smiled at him and he pulled me immediately into a huge Calum hug.

"Can I come with you to the airport?" He asked with a pout and I subconsciously looked over to Luke's house.

"Yeah sure." I said before we all piled into the car and headed off towards the airport.