murderer // martinus gunnarsen

16

i run next to him and see astrid falling down to the water. i throw the gun as far as i can. then i fall down on the ground.

"martinus what the hell!" he yells again.

"i'm sorry, i'm so sorry. i didn't want to do it but he was threatening me!" i say with tears in my eyes and my hands covering them.

"who was?" adrian asks in a slightly calmer voice, but i can still hear he's mad. i'm mad too.

i give him my phone and he goes through the messages. then he gives it back to me and without saying anything he sits down next to me.

"i'm not saying you did the right thing. i'm just saying i would've done the same in that situation." he says after a while.

"i'm so stupid. i hate myself." i just mumble. "i should've just shot myself instead."

"come on, don't say that." adrian pats my back. i groan and fall on my back.

"i'm just gonna jump after her. then we can be dead together." i suddenly get up.

i start walking towards the edge but before i can jump adrian takes a hold of my arm and pulls me back.

"you're a fucking idiot!" adrian says and slaps the back of my head. "you're not going to do anything."

"but i can't just go home now! 'hi mom i killed someone, what did you do tonight?'" i say throwing my hands all around.

"you're not going to say anything!" adrian says. "you're going to go home, straight to your room. if someone asks what you did just say you walked astrid home."

"i can't say that. she never got home!" i say frustrated.

"oh lord. just say you walked her to the store and she went home from there." adrian says.

"oh lord. let's go." i start walking home with adrian. we part ways at my house and i go to the door.

i take a deep breath before walking in. i take my shoes off as quickly as possible and then go up to my room.

i lock the door and fall onto my bed. i sigh and bang my head against the pillow. stupid stupid stupid. what the hell is wrong with me?

i punch my wall and then groan because it hurt so much. i hear someone open my door. great.

"martinus what the-" marcus starts but then sees that i look like a mess. "are you okay?" he finishes and closes the door behind him.

i watch him put on the lamp on my table and then sit on my bed. he pulls me up to a sitting position and then looks at me to motion that he's ready to listen.

"i don't know, i guess i am." i sigh. "i just had a small fight with astrid when i was taking her home." i feel a sting in my heart when those words come out of my mouth.

"oh, i'm sorry man. i hope you can make up soon." marcus says patting my back. i just sigh.

marcus gets up and leaves me alone. i fall on my back and put my pillow over my face and scream into it. stupid stupid stupid.