Rainbows (A Hogwarts Mystery Story)

Chapter 12

There are many kinds of birds that could take flight with just a flap of the wings. A beat and a jump later, they would soar through the air and leave everything behind.

I wished I could be like one of them.

With a folded letter in my hand, I made my way up to the owlery for the first time in my life, footsteps echoing as I mounted the stone steps. A foul stench of owl droppings made its way to my nose, thankfully made dull by the cold breezes wafting through the open windows. As I approached the long line of owls dozing off in the spacious chamber, my eyes eventually landed on a handsome brown owl, ruffling its feathers and blinking its large black eyes when it noticed me. 

This was probably the first time I wrote to my parents. It only just occurred to me how much I miss them while I was on my constant search for the Cursed Vaults. 

"Safe flight, then," I murmured to the owl the moment I tied my note onto its leg. With a little hoot, the owl soared off, and as I watched it flap its wings I wished that I could be free from this kind of life like this bird could be. I wished I was just a normal student like everyone else without the story of the infamous brother looming over my head. Somehow, I felt my initial anger at Rowan dissipate just a little as my gaze lingered on the owl disappearing from view, but it soon returned when I remembered why I wrote to my family in the first place.

During the summer, my parents brought me to a doctor because they thought I was going mad. They sent me to a nearby clinic to check on my mental state, because for a moment they thought that my battle with You-Know-Who was just a nightmare. Just like my brother, they worried that I would soon go insane and disappear on them too. I understood that they wanted me to become more sane and follow the rules for once, but I've already broken so many to back down now. I didn't want to be a rebel, but when things were happening to others, for some reason I felt like I had to take some responsibility. I had to break the rules to save the school, despite the professors saying not to do anything out of line. 

Why did I have this kind of curse in the first place? My entire time at Hogwarts seemed cursed, and made more so with the kinds of dangers I put my friends in. As much as I wanted things to be normal, it just isn't possible.

Maybe it's just best if I leave my friends. Maybe it's best if I became my own mentor. It's better than to put anyone I loved in further trouble.

The slam of the door suddenly startled me from my reverie, and I turned around to see a girl I've never met before stare at me with wide eyes.

"I'm so sorry," she said, shaking her head. "I didn't know anyone else was up here."

I would have typically left her alone right then and there if she just wanted solitude, but that would seem pretty rude. Instead, I just shrugged. "It's fine. You can stay up here. I just sent a letter to my parents."

"You write to them often?" the girl asked, sitting down on the stone floor and letting out an exasperated sigh.

"Not really. This is the first," I admitted. "It's just...things have been tough lately, so I thought I'd talk with them. Well, send them a letter, really."

"I've had a lot of trouble fitting in since I got here," the girl eventually said after a moment of silence. "It's been hard since everyone has trouble seeing you as a monster." 

"You don't seem like a monster, though." The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them, and I frowned at the girl, sitting beside her. "I mean, you're nice..."

"That's what everyone says, until they know of my secret." The girl ran a hand through her pale blonde hair and sighed again, her eyes fixated on the central point of the turret. "It's not like I asked that werewolf to change my life forever."