Chapter 19

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Yes, I know. I'm evil and I haven't uploaded in forever. But I was on vacation (still am - I just happened to get my laptop working again) so I did a quick upload :) Hope you like! Don't forget to Vote and Comment <3

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Every last bit of it had crumbled to ashes, leaving dark marks where the old Victorian mansion had stood only yesterday. Smoke continued to drift up; the acrid scent drifting through the golden colored oaks.

Charred wood lay around in piles, the ebony colored ash scattered so thickly around the vast yard that the grass was hardly visible. Lauren’s eyes grew wider, the nails of her small hands digging fiercely into her skin. She bit her lip hard to control the tears, knowing once they started that there was no ending them.

A searing pain cut through her as she tasted blood from the constant biting of her pale lip, but it didn’t last long. Numbness had long since taken over as she gazed down at the horrendous sight beneath her.

It seemed impossible that there could’ve been more astonishing surprises after the events of the girls’ unforgettable night, but there was.

Deep down, Lauren clung to the tiny bud of hope that this had all been just a bad dream, a nightmare. It would vanish within an instant after she and the others woke up to the smell of Mrs. Anderson’s famous pancakes like any other sleepover.  Or that entire night would serenely pass over and life would return to normal.

Now not even a shred of hope remained.

Not after she caught sight of the vehicles.

Lined all along the street, up and down both sides of the road were cars, trucks, minivans, sedans and even sports cars – because after all this was Hampton Falls. The vehicles adorned the street like lights on a Christmas tree. Mingling in were news vans and reporters who were busy setting up.

Even from so far away, the unmistakable glint of flashing lights and cameras was easily distinguishable. The distinct rumble of the media vans along with the bark of chatter between the reporters reached her ears. Lauren gulped, clutching the railing for support, her mind whirling in its haste of trying to process all this new information.

She couldn’t seem to wrap her mind around the amount of people she saw. It was mind-boggling. From her incredible vantage point, it was clear to see that not only were there news reporters and journalists along with the rest of the press, but also an incredible amount of citizens crowded around.

Nosy residents that felt the need to sniff out the latest piece of gossip in their quaint little town, peeping neighbors who continuously snuck peeks through their flimsy curtains, concerned citizens who wanted to stop by and see if they could be of any help and more filled up the steadily growing crowd around the rubble and ash that had settled on the lawn.

Beside her, Jen rubbed her temple achingly, wearing a stupefied look of fear and worry. Kelly raked her slender fingers through her auburn hair, yanking out strands in the process.

Not that she noticed of course. Kelly was much too busy fretting and worrying, just like the other two.

Lauren gulped, her eyes trained on the mix of people that seemed to multiply every time she blinked. It was hardly sunrise, and there were already so many bodies filling up the empty space. She couldn’t even begin to imagine the amount of people that the afternoon would bring.

And then there was the media. That alone sent Lauren into another dizzying panic attack. Her knuckles turned white from the sheer force of her grip on the balcony’s ledge. She felt sick to her stomach, like a bad case of a stomach virus along with intense cramps and a punch to her gut.

But it wasn’t an ache that would heal by rubbing cream or swallowing a pill. No, the excruciating pain wasn’t one that would evaporate within an hour or a day or even a week. Because it wasn’t a stomach ache or a bruise or a bad case of PMS. This was so much worse.

It hurt so much more. If she had to be totally honest, she felt bad. Awful, actually. It was disgusting and vile what they had done. Lauren held so much remorse and regret. Remorse that she couldn’t fix it, regret that there was something to fix in the first place.

But all that guilt didn’t – couldn’t – compare to what she felt now. Maybe if it was guilt, she could testify that it was a selfless emotion or at least justify it as humanitarian. If it was sorrow over her actions, she might have felt a little bit better about the entire ordeal.

 But it wasn’t guilt that sent her heart racing now. It was completely selfish and self-centered thought, but it was the only one on her mind. The kick to her stomach, that feeling that continued to haunt her was fear. Pure and total fear.

Fear of getting caught.

Lauren wanted to kick herself. How could she have been so stupid? So blind? It wasn’t always Jen’s job to be the brain of the group. She had a mouth. A voice. Lauren  was perfectly capable of concocting a word with two letters. No. That’s all she had to say.

No I’m not doing this. No this is a stupid idea. No there are way too many consequences involved. No we are risking everything for nothing. No there are so many better things to do than ruin someone else’s life for our petty fun. No. No. No.

Any of those would have done sufficed. So why was it an impossible task to form those sentences when she needed to? Why couldn’t she ever speak up? Why couldn’t she ever stand up for what she believed in? Why did she always succumb to doing things she knew deep down weren’t right?

Lauren blew out the breath, struggling to remain calm. Asking why wasn’t going to solve anything. Even if she reviewed, analyzed and scrutinized every single one of her decisions, she would still draw a blank.

Book smart she might have been, but when it came to being smart on the street – making good choices and having a spine to stand up for herself, she had a terrible habit of falling face first with a splat.

And now she was paying for it dearly.

“Well, we’re done for.” The words made her jump a mile, sending her racing heart into hyperventilation mode. Lauren placed a hand on her heaving chest, taking deep breaths and trying to remain in control.

It had been a long night and was the start of an even longer day, and she was filled with more anxiety than when she had taken the state exams last spring. Anything could set her off, and everything put her on edge.

“What?” Jen asked finally, after Kelly had thrown out that bold idea. Lauren wanted to roll her eyes. It was typical of Kelly to do that. Toss in big words or an overly dramatic statement just to get a reaction. Now if Kelly actually explained what she meant, it might be a tiny bit more helpful, to say the least.

But Jen had taken the bait this time and asked for clarification on Kelly’s latest piece of drama. So all Lauren could do was wait for her friend to suck up the attitude and spill what she really wanted to say.

Her cutting comments about Kelly’s knack for flair seemed caustic and harsh, but frankly, she didn’t care at the moment. Lauren wasn’t in the greatest of moods but that was to be expected after such a night. It had been way to stressful, filled with more startling secrets than she could handle.

Her nerves bounced up and down as she waited impatiently, closing her eyes in annoyance. Lauren wanted to be done. Over. Finished. So, she made a bad decision. Okay, a really bad decision. A mind-blowing, incredibly stupid, pathetically dumb choice that couldn’t be reversed no matter what she did.

But it was an act of the past, and she already got the consequence of her transgression. So why didn’t the agony stop already?

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⏰ Last updated: Aug 08, 2012 ⏰

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