The Amazing Adventures of a Socially Awkward Overthinker

The Moment of Realization

I was in my usual position, laying down on my bed, staring at the laptop screen, when I realized something. I'm not some insane person who needs to push everyone away. I'm not someone who needs to be thrown in an asylum, either. I'm just a human.

I get anxious sometimes, depressed, etc. We all do. How many of you honestly have never felt like that? Everyone feels like this at least once in their lives, because that's part of being a person. It doesn't make you weird or alone...it's perfectly normal. And yes, I said normal. I didn't say that anyone was normal. I think that no human can be normal, but what we do can be considered normal.

We all have those days where we just want to be left alone, and stay in bed all day. Most of us have cried ourselves to sleep before, right? Who hasn't been stressed out before? Who has never had a bad week, month, or year before? That's what I'd like to know. And yes, some people have it worse than we do...there will always be someone who has it worse, so that's no reason to feel bad about being upset sometimes. That's like saying you can't be happy because other people have a better reason for being happy. It's okay to be upset, and it's okay to be happy.

I don't need to try to go to a doctor because you know what's the best form of therapy? Having support from loved ones or anyone at all, knowing that you're not alone...knowing that even though not everyone understands, that someone will be there no matter what and is trying their hardest to make you feel better...knowing that you're important, that someone's willing to listen and that someone cares ...that is the most effective form of therapy.

Also, you can't just look at the good side of things, just like you can't just look at the bad things. Take me, for example.

I can be a bit stubborn. The bad thing about that is it could be annoying if I don't control it, and I could end up bothering people if I'm stubborn for the wrong reasons. The good thing is that I don't give up. I pursue what I want to pursue and I don't back down when things get tough.

I over think everything. The obvious bad side to that is that I end up afraid of everything because I think that nothing will go right. The good thing is that I'm prepared for bad things to happen, and I'll accept it when they do and plan ahead.

I need to take more chances, I shelter myself too much. I'm so afraid of getting hurt, that I don't take the chance and settle for being okay, when I could be amazingly happy. And if I end up sad for a bit, it won't last. Just like always, being sad will pass, and I'll be alright again. Not only that, but I'll learn from it. I'll grow from it. So, why am I afraid? There's no reason to miss the perfect oppurtunity because of a simple fear. I just need to go and take the chance. I'm going to face my greatest fear and go to the people I love and tell them I love them. I will show the person I really care about that I will always be there, no matter what and that I love him. I will no longer be afraid. I will no longer hold myself back...I'm giving all of me, so that at least I know that I really did try, and who knows? Maybe I'll end up being happy...and it's that chance that makes everything worth it. But of course, it will take time, but it's well worth the wait.