A Court of Wind and Shadows

Chapter 21

/Unedited/

Happy New Years!!

First of all, I want to apologize - I know I said that this chapter would be out soon, and it's been months I know. I have been busy and lacking good ideas, but for now here's another chapter.

Enjoy!

~

Feyre

The plan that I had both made and revised with  the Inner Circle ran through my head as I played with the edge of my hair.

It was rudimentary and a bit subpar to what we usually made...but a different situation had arisen.

I had to cover myself, both physically and my scent, from people who could immediately scent the differences of any female. Nonetheless, this...tiny difference would sure as hell not hold me.

Our plan was shaky and risky...and perhaps a bit stupid as well. Then again, I had weighed in on a large part of it, as did Cassian once while he was completely and utterly dazed after a night of drinking which he apparently chose to have no recollection of.

I snorted out loud just thinking of it.

"What's so funny?" Arms appeared around me waist, embracing and holding me from behind as the arms seemed to instinctively cover my stomach.

I looked towards my mate, and leaned back into the embrace. "The fact that you Illyrians still seem to act like overgrown babies."

"And when exactly," Rhys nipped at my earlobe, sending a shiver down my spine, "did I, or any of the other so called Illyrian babies just do something to provoke that thought."

"Hmmm," was all I responded with. I lazily turned around in his arms and caressed the outline of his face with the tip of my finger. He pressed a kiss to the tip of my finger, before it moved away from his face and up into his hair, gently twisting it. A soft breeze floated through the house, and I pulled my mate closer as it brushed its cold fingers on my skin. Rhys laid his head on top of my head, and we stood there, the moment calm and so peaceful I wish we could stay there forever. But unfortunately, the world could not-would not, pause its problems for us.

"You know," he murmured against my hair, "I'm still waiting for an answer."

I smiled against his chest. "I suppose you won't get one, unless you make me tell you or keep me in this stuffy house."

A wince came from him, and my eyes shot open with realization as what I said fully registered to my own ears. Shit. "I didn't mean-,"

"I am still very sorry, you know, for what I said." He gently pushed me back from his body until I could look him. "More than I can express." A deep sigh clawed its way out of him. "I don't know what got into me."

I gazed at him, and I melted at the pure sincerity, the genuity, the honesty in his eyes. A glimmer of a memory rushed past me, darting in and out of my mind. A memory of a time when honesty seemed to always be dangerous territory, when a bond was the only thing really holding me together. A time so long ago. I was a different person then, a girl who first wanted stability, but then wanted a freedom that the male who tried to protect her could not, or would not, give-no matter what it was, as he viewed it to be not freedom-but danger. That girl soon became broken.

But that was a long time ago.

And I was not that girl anymore.

I was different once more. Stronger, powerful, whole.

I knew what it was, how it felt, to lose control. I had seen it. But the difference was how soon one could get it back and realize what they had done when they lost their grasp on control.