Immortali

Chapter 36: Choosing

It was the next day that had Raina thinking as she walked to school.

So, Drear? They were joining Samael now.

Raina remembered the fangs, the creepy purple eyes and the long claw-like nails. She'd never seen anyone move the way they did. How they'd just melted into the shadow, as though they'd been a part of it all along.

She shivered to think about it.

The Drear would definitely be a problem for The Circle. Though not completely Immortal, they weren't weak either. Raina had a feeling they could definitely hold their own in a fight. And she didn't particularly want to be there when that happened.

Breaking away from her thoughts of Drear and The Circle and Samael, Raina walked through the school gate. This felt normal, everything was normal...

Just smile and pretend you're normal.

But that all fell apart when Layla turned to her, scowling.

What in the...?

"Where were you?" The hard edge in Layla's voice cut through Raina's confusion like a knife. A very sharp knife.

If she could, Raina would've frowned even more. "Where was I when?"

Layla looked taken aback. "Studying history at my place? Yesterday? Or did you 'forget' again?"

Raina gasped.

Oh, crap.

"Um, Lay, I am really, really, sorry. Something came up yesterday and... and..." she trailed off when she realised Layla was glaring at her with nothing but hostility.

"Something came up? Like what? Why didn't you call me? Send me a text? Anything?"

Raina hung her head. She held back the tears that stung the corner of her eyes.

"I didn't... it was a family emergency..."

"Not what your Mum said when I called her. She said you hadn't even asked her, so I told her that I 'was mistaken'. And do you want to know what you were doing instead? Apparently you were at a private tutoring session with Ms. Mist. What the hell, Ray? Since when have you done private tutoring?"

Raina but her lip. "Um, I just didn't want to say anything about it, Lay. It's just that, she's been helping me all year, but I was a bit embarrassed. I'm really sorry I forgot."

"Sure you are. Just like you were sorry all the other times."

"But I am! I'm sorry for everything! I don't mean to forget, Lay. It just sort of... happens."

Raina knew it was weak, pathetic, flimsy even, but she had to give it a shot.

Layla just shook her head. "Yeah? Well, it seems to 'just happen' a lot. I'm your friend, Raina. I'm not asking you to choose me over your family, or cut of you left arm. I just want you to be there for me, but, these past few months, you haven't really been there for anyone."

Raina looked up. She couldn't hold the tears back anymore. They streamed down her face, her eyes becoming puffy and red. "What? That's not true!"

But, even as she sobbed, she knew it was. She hadn't been there for anyone. Where had she been when Taylor needed her? Or James? Or Layla?

Layla's responding scoff said it all though. "Don't BS me, Ray. You haven't been around for me, and I know you haven't been around for Taylor either."

"How? How would you know?"

"Because, ya know, usually when your best friend's younger sister calls you up and says that they're worried about their sister, you tend to believe them."

Raina stood back. Taylor had called Layla? She was worried about her?

"W-when was that?"

Layla scowled. "Last night. She told me she heard you leave the house sometime in the middle of the night. She said you didn't come back for a few hours. She didn't know where you'd gone, so she called me up at midnight when you got back, asking why the hell we'd go somewhere so late."

Oh, no...

"Lay, it's not what it looks like-"

"Oh, really?" Layla asked, one eyebrow raised. "Because, to me, it looks like you're ignoring your friend, lying to your family and sneaking out to God only knows where in the dead of night."

"That's not it!"

"Then what is it?" Layla screamed desperately. "What's going on? What're you doing that is so important you can't tell me, or Taylor, or James? I don't even know who you are anymore!"

Raina stared at her, her mind was working overtime, but she just kept coming up blank.

What do I do? What do I tell her? The truth? Do I tell her I'm Immortal? That I can summon fire and ice out of nowhere? Do I tell her the part about me being some kind of saviour?

She looked at her tear-stained friend again, and mentally shook her head.

No. I can't bring her into my world.

She sighed. A part of her felt like it was dying, breaking away and disappearing into fog and mist, never to be seen again. She knew this part of her. She knew it was inevitable. It was going to happen eventually. She'd held onto it for so long though, just thinking, if I keep holding on, maybe I can keep it. Maybe it can be like this forever.

Of course, it couldn't. Why? Because the part Raina was letting go of was her humanity. Her human life, and the ties that came with it. Layla was human. She could never live in Raina's world. She could never understand the things that Raina did and why she did them.

And Raina was Immortali. And the more she became Immortali, the more her humanity disappeared, eaten away by the pull of magic.

This was how it was supposed to be. This was always how it was going to end, so why did it feel wrong?

Sighing, Raina shook her head.

"I can't... I can't tell you, Lay. I'm sorry," she sobbed.

She could hear Layla's deep breathing. She had her head down. She couldn't see her friend, so she couldn't decide whether it was out of sadness her anger.

Probably both.

Finally, Layla spoke. "Fine. If you won't tell me, then- then we can't be friends anymore. Is that what you want, Ray?"

Raina remained silent.

Say nothing. It's better this way.

"Ray?" Layla's voice sounded like it was cracking. Still, Raina kept her head down.

Don't look, don't look. Better this way.

"Raina? Raina? Is that what you want?"

Tears leaked down Raina's face, but she didn't look up. She couldn't. She didn't think she could face Layla ever again.

There was a pause in Layla's crying. A deep inhale, and then an exhale.

"Fine. Have it your way then."

Raina waited until she could no longer hear Layla's steps. She looked up and saw that her friend had disappeared.

It's for the best, she told herself. But she still couldn't get past the gnawing pain in her gut that told her she was wrong. The part of her that desperately wanted to forget being Immortali. The part of her that still wanted to be human.