The Unknown Alchemist

Chapter 30 - Girl in the war

Avery felt the warmth of the fire on her face and a heavy blanket over top of her. She kept her eyes closed as her memory processed what had happened. She was in the Cabin and could hear the wind howling outside, the boards creaking under the strain. A draft snuck in under the door and she pulled the blanket tighter around her neck. The familiar scent of rough lumber and fresh tea drifted her way.

"Avery, I know you're awake," Adelyn said beside her.

"No, I'm not," she answered, keeping her eyes closed. She took a few more breaths and then pinched her lips. "I'm in the Cabin, aren't I?"

"You're in a house. That is made of wood. A wooden house with multiple rooms. This room is the living space and upstairs there are bedrooms."

With a sigh Avery opened her eyes and looked straight into the fireplace. Maybe if she didn't look around, it wasn't really there. If she kept her eyes on the fire then the rest of the room would fall away and she would find herself anywhere but in a cabin in the woods. A tent, a cave, a street corner would be better than suffocating in here.

She sat up slowly and pinched the bridge of her nose before looking up. Niamh gently opened her hand and placed a mug of tea in it.

"So, that could have gone better."

"How do you feel?" Adelyn asked.

"Foolish," she answered. "I wasn't thinking straight. All I could see was a cabin and... I lost it."

And a fox. She had seen a fox beside the training ring. It was a different fox, logic told her, but she couldn't stop thinking about it. A fox appeared just before she was told to enter a cabin in the woods.

"How is it that I'm in the not-cabin-house when I should be lying in the snow in itty-bitty pieces?"

Niamh got up and went to the stove to scoop out some roasted vegetables and chicken onto a plate. "Prime Jaret may be a complete ass, but he is a very experienced warrior and delivered only a controlled blast." She looked up at Avery pointedly. "Still, it was close."

She handed over the plate of food.

Avery took a bite but kept her eyes on the plate. "I don't like...I can't handle..." She gulped and looked at the fire. "Every time someone comes near I can feel his hands on my body."

Niamh and Adelyn brought their mugs of tea to the fire and sat down without a word.

"Sometimes I wonder if...if I'll ever be able...to be close..." She couldn't seem to finish.

Adelyn sipped her tea and Niamh played with a ring on her finger absentmindedly.

"Are you afraid of us? Do you not trust us?"

"It's not about trust. Well it is, but I mean it's not calculated. It's just an instinctual reaction. Survival. Like I've practiced pulling away for so long I can't stop myself now."

She took a small bite of food. These people had done so much for her but she still couldn't shake the dark shadows at the edges of her vision. It had gotten better but when she was stressed or startled her reaction was always the same. Even with Roedin, whom she knew the most. Roedin had been there and understood that fear she carried.

"I've spent my whole life slowly dying of loneliness. Now I'm surrounded by people and I can't stand to be close to them," Avery whispered to the flames.

At that moment she longed to sit with Roedin and feel his warmth beside her. His scent was everything that other male was not. It was gentle and earthy and comforting like the familiar scent of home.