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She couldn't move.
Couldn't move her hands, couldn't move her entire being. For a heavy weight was on her chest and her body was still, like she was floating on water. Or a sinking ship that realised too late that they'd drowned to the bottom of the ocean.
Except this time, the water around her were white walls, the blurry haze of sunlight was her lamp on the ceiling, and the sea floor came in the form of her bed.
Drowning didn't feel like such a bad thing after all.
A knock sounded from her door.
"Ellie?" Her grandmother's soft voice did not stir her. It hadn't for the past few days. "There's someone here to see you."
Her heart lurched.
A faint motion of her head, and she was eyeing the door in suspicion. No one knew what happened after the Firelight Festival. She made sure of it. Partly because she hadn't had the guts to tell, but mostly because it was her problem. Her burden. She couldn't give that to anyone else. If it hurt this much, she couldn't even imagine them holding it.
This was hers to deal with.
"El?"
Her heart skipped a beat.
His voice made her feel things she fought so hard to explain. For a moment, it was like being in the beach again, hearing the waves crash. Of seagulls and a child's laugh. Of home.
His voice pulled at her heart heartstrings and made her stomach flutter and oh god please say my name again just one more time.
It gave her enough strength to sit up even when her chest was hurting.
"Can I come in?" he whispered, his tone so gentle she strained to hear him. "I understand if you don't want me to. But I also can't leave you like this. So I'll just wait outside and..." she could almost see his eyebrows furrowing. "...sit on the floor."
