Awakening The Forgotten

Chapter 2- "Oh right... Him." She thought trembling.

Cassandra stood, eyes closed, on the balcony of her small apartment listening to sounds of the bustling city. She took a deep breath enjoying the feel of the cool breeze entering her lungs.

It was here that Cassandra came to find her calm.

She had never found a problem with the city air, as most people did, in fact she found the mix of scents interesting, enjoyable even, but mostly it was distracting.

Sighing is acceptance of the fact that if she didn’t get a move on she’d be late, she took one final deep breath and headed inside, the temperature change was considerable, she hadn’t noticed how cold it had gotten whilst she had been outside. The cold didn’t bother her much anymore, again it was distracting. Distraction was a good thing.

She sat, shuffling a little to make herself comfortable at her vanity table and peered into the mirror, ready to paste on make-up in excessive amounts in an attempt to cover to dark circles under her eyes. The haunting dream she had had the past night had taken it’s toll. Cassandra had a bad feeling that if Erica saw that she was experiencing trouble sleeping again, she would want to run more tests, and that was the last thing Cassandra wanted.

“I’ll never be subjected to that again”, she thought with conviction. “even if it was Erica this time”, whom she knew would be gentler.

She applied a lightening liquid foundation under her eyes and then powdered to finish, adding bronzer across her cheek bones and a dash of lip balm to finish. Her eyes didn’t need work, they were naturally circled with long thick lashes, that she had come to realise other women envied. Cassandra didn’t understand this as she would trade her eyes with anyone for the chance at concealing her emotions; her eyes were expressive and never lied, even when her mouth did. Or tried to.

In all honesty? Although it made Cassandra feel better to wear the make-up Erica would see through it. She read Cassandra like a book, that’s what made her such an amazing friend. Not to mention an exceptional therapist. But the make-up made her feel better, so she continued the charade anyway.

Deciding it was time to leave, she grabbed her bag shuddering at the all too familiar sound of pills rattling in a bottle. Her medication. The little pills that keep her ‘sane’.

“Keeps me sedated is more like it,” she muttered angrily to herself.

What Cassandra wanted more than anything was to be able to live a life of freedom. Live without the need to carry pills and a mild sedative just in case she lost control. It had been years since she had had an episode “thanks to the pills,” the drugged part of her mind stated matter-of-factly. The doctors had called it Schizophrenia. It wasn’t Schizophrenia, she knew she were disturbed, but that illness was not the cause. Sometimes you just know. When she was younger however the pills had helped. Helped her develop and maintain a farce of normalcy. So she had complied as if normalcy would help her. The damage had been done.

Now that she was older she realised she felt more in control, more knowledgeable, stronger. She decided it was time to test her mental strength. Something somewhere in the back of her mind was screaming at her not to do this, but the decision was made. Today, Cassandra Hatchette would go drug free.

With a new found confidence and exuberance for life Cassandra found herself smiling, a genuine smile. She had not smiled like this in years. Her walk to the café at which she was to meet Erica was brisk and gratifying. The drugs she took smothered her senses, dulling her emotions, she could never fully appreciate anything whilst taking them. No food was ever succulent, no smell was sweetly overwhelming and no colour vibrant enough be captivating.