Hating Intimacy #1

Hating Intimacy- Chapter 5

HATING INTIMACY
CHAPTER FIVE

"I wish I never loved him. I wish I could stop loving him."

Deborah's P.O.V

I snap.

"Could you just leave me alone!" I yell with growing fury. Both my parents eyes widen in surprise. "I don't have anything to explain to you okay? Just leave me alone." I snap and walk to the fridge, then pull out a soda can.

"Deborah! What's gone into you?" My mom yells in surprise.

I ignore her and make my way to the door but she holds my arm, preventing me from leaving. I turn to her and she gasps, letting go of me in the process.

"Deborah. What happened to you my baby." She says softly.

"What part of leave me alone do you not understand?"

"Don't speak to your mother like that!" My dad booms.

"I speak to anyone however I like it!" I retort and he clenches his fist in anger, feeling challenged.

"What's gotten into you Deborah?" He says, his voice calmer and his eyes filled with shock.

"Now you care?" I ask as tears escape my eyes.

I turn away and storm to my room leaving my parents shocked. When I got to the room I threw the soda can to the ground and lock the door with the key.

My legs finally give up and I fall on my knees in tears.

After confessing my heart out to him. He left.

He left me to mend my broken heart on my own. He left me to do the impossible.

***

Another shaky breath left my mouth and I put my hands tighter around my knees, pulling them closer to my chest. The only sounds in the room were my heavy breathing and growling stomach.

My throat felt dry and I decide to go to the kitchen for a glass of water. Glancing at the clock I see the time was 2:37am in the morning. With a sigh I make my way to my bedroom door.

Once I got to the kitchen I got my self a glass of water. I try walking to the exit but my legs are too weak, so I end up leaning on the island instead. My breathing was slow and heavy, my head is pounding and my eyes are stinging. I tried focusing on the pain but it wasn't enough, I'm still hurt.

The emotional pain is horrible. He broke me, I can't face him anymore, I can't go back to school and see them together again. I can't stand living with him ignoring me.

I place the still full glass of water on the table and sit on a stool then put my head in my hands, the tears fell and dropped on the tiled floor below me, leaving tiny puddles of tears. I just want it to stop, I don't want to go through this anymore.

I wish I never loved him. I wish I could stop loving him.

I raise my head when something caught my eye, I place my hands on the island and steadily pull myself up. Each step I took towards the object my mind would tell me to stop, it would tell me it's not the answer.