The Last Weapon

14: Forget Everything You Knew

Damon's POV

"Cute PJs," I said, and Elena's head whipped up. I was sitting on her window seat, staring down her blue tank top and plaid pants. She tried to look strong but I could tell she was afraid, which made my insides twist.

"I'm tired, Damon," she warned, and I frowned. She thought I was going to attack her or her brother again. I wasn't drunk this time, though.

"I brought you this." I stood and walked towards her, holding up her worn, silver necklace that had first kept her from being compelled to kiss me. I could still remember the sharp sting of the slap she gave me. Her eyes lit up.

"I thought that was gone,"  she whispered.

"No." She reached for it.

"Thank you," I pulled back my arm when she reached for it and took a step towards her, and she took one away from me in turn. "Please give me the necklace, Damon."

"I just have to say something first." There was an icy pit growing in my stomach, and the fear in her eyes was growing every second. Here it goes.

"Why do you have to say it with my necklace?" she asked, her voice trembling. My irritation was growing by the second.

"Well," I glanced at the piece of jewelry in my lowered hand, "because what I'm about to say is one of the most... selfish things I've ever said in my life." Elena understood immediately. She took a deep breath and tried to look away, but wouldn't dare.

"Damon, don't go there." I held my hands up in a sign of innocence, one she didn't take well. She looked as if she might back away again.

"I just have to say it once," I said softly, and took a step forward, my face coming up mere inches away from hers. Something in her gaze was softening, which encouraged me to go on. "You just need to hear it." I took a deep breath. I felt like I was on a cliff, overlooking a churning sea, and I was just about to take a step and... fall.

"I love you, Elena."

The tense, strung-up look on her face dissipated into something warm, and almost sad. I didn't stop, though. "And it's because I love you," I've said it twice now, "that I can't be selfish with you. And you shouldn't know this. I don't deserve you... but my brother does."

I stepped as close as I dare, and Elena took one soft, gasping intake of breath, but I only kissed her forehead. When I pulled back, there were tears in her eyes, and she was staring at my lips. I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, and left my hand there on her cheek. "God, I wish you wouldn't have to forget this. But you do." I felt a tear slip down my cheek, something so foreign I honestly couldn't remember the last time I'd ever cried. In a second, I was gone, and she was left standing there never remembering how her necklace had returned to her neck.

I loved her.

And that's when I woke up.

My face was wet, and when I swiped the back of my hand across my cheek, I knew they were tears. This wasn't supposed to happen. I wasn't supposed to have nightmares. But I couldn't stop thinking about her. I had finally told Elena I loved her, and she wouldn't even remember it vaguely enough to send a second odd glance my way.

"You're a tragedy, Angelface."

My eyes locked with Briana, who was standing in my doorway. She looked nothing like she had last night, all bright and full of joy. Ready to live. She seemed sad, as if every last thing she ever gave a damn about was ripped to shreds. Despair, grief, death. That's what I felt from her. My black shirt hung limply on her shoulders, draping down to her thighs. The frown she wore made her seem fifteen years older than the actual age she was frozen at.