•a Silent Cause•

•6•

Seven days went by faster then Kailas would have liked. On Tuesday, Demi came back to school. Cass and Kailas didn't tell him about Jordan in the library, but either way Jordan got the message. He stayed away from Kailas, saving Kailas from more pain, and giving him time to heal. Kailas was able to hide his injuries from Demi for about a day, but Demi had noticed Kailas limping on Wednesday. After that, Kailas couldn't find any more excuses to keep it from him. He already knew something happened because of their conversation Saturday night, but Kailas hadn't given him the details. Now, behind the staircase, away from everyone else, Kailas told Demi the details.

Being with Demi, now gave Kailas a way away from his dad. After school, they would go to the library down the block, on Friday Kailas and Demi met up with Arthur. Kailas couldn't remember the last time he saw Arthur. He had been the one Kailas kept in touch with, but besides school Kailas never saw him. And having classes on a completely different floor, made it kind of tricky to meet up.

Kailas was prepared for it to be awkward just like how it had been with Demi and Cass, but Arthur was different. Immediately Kailas felt like he was twelve again.

Saturday night, the day before Christmas Eve, Kailas locked himself in his room. His hands wrapped tightly around the walkie-talkie, Demi's voice coming through the radio. Kailas felt warm, his heart felt heavy in his chest. He was aware of every breath. His fingers constantly scratching at his legs and blanket. His stomach was full with anxiety, both good and bad.

On his nightstand, sat an empty blue pouch.

Sunday morning, Kailas stayed in bed. He kept his head ducked under the covers, staying in that position until he could hear slight beeping from the walkie-talkie, then static, and then Demi's voice.

"How are you doing?"

Kailas hummed under the blanket. He still felt nauseous, but also excited.

"Same as yesterday."

"Are you ready for today?"

"Ah, sort of?"

"It's going to be okay, just like old times."

Kailas smiled. "Okay"

They said goodbye, Kailas pushed himself out of bed, got dressed quickly, then slowly and quietly walked to the door.

Kailas wasn't surprised he still knew the way to Demi's house. When Kailas was younger, he was there so much, he could walk there and back in the dark, which he had done several times.

But this time, even with the sun beating down on his back, making Kailas feel warm but also freezing at the same time. Kailas felt like he really was in the dark. Each step was hesitant; he waited until his foot was fully on the ground before even lifting the other. As if any second he was prepared for someone to knock him down.

Kailas stood on the steps of their front door. He pulled at the sides of his jacket.

He could feel himself sweating. Most of his childhood memories took place at this house, all of the happy ones did at least. And if was not in this house, then it was with the people that lived in this house. He had found a family with these people. Though he was always distant, and always pulling away from Lailani and Ennis, he still felt safer with them then he had with any other adult. Kailas knew that both Arthur and Cass had problems at home, just like him. But that didn't matter when they were all together. Kailas could feel safe, and normal with them. But now, standing on the steps, in front of the very house Kailas had learned to think of as home, Kailas felt nothing but shame. Humiliation.

He felt like he was coming back home, after years of ignoring these people, the people who were generous enough to show him kindness. Lailani and Ennis, the people that didn't just tolerate their son's weird friend, but actually cared about him.