Beaten

2

The sound of my alarm wakes me. It was only 4:00 am, but if I wanted to make it out the house alive I had to get up at these times. My father wasn't angry when I came home late last night, in fact he didn't even notice that I was gone. It made me relived but also feel a pang of sadness in my heart. I get up shower and get dressed for school. My mother had told me that she had left the directions to my new school on the table. I pick up the sheet of paper and look at it for a bit before grabbing my bag and heading out the house. I had no use for food these days, it would just be wasted. 

It was only 5:00 am by the time I get out of the house so I decide to take a detour to the coffee shop I found yesterday. I pay for a coffee and sit in the same booth from yesterday, I was so thankful for coffee shops that were open early. I look at the cup and quickly take out my phone, opening my calorie counter app. There were only 15 calories in a coffee, I was still okay. I look out the window, the sun slowly rising.

7:00 am flashed on my watch, I get up from the booth and throw my cup in the trash on the way out. I step outside into the cold winds, the thin layer of snow covering the path way crunches under my shoe. I walk to school, it wasn't too far from the coffee shop actually. I went to the office to get my time table and text books. "Welcome Jungkook, here is your time table, to get your text book you will have to go the the building next to the gym," the principal instructed. The principal looked around a bit then saw someone. "Taehyung," the principal called out, signaling for the boy to come over to him. Taehyung sounded familiar.

I turned my head, it was one of the six popular boys from yesterday. "Taehyung, this is our new student Jungkook, I think you guys a few classes together," the principal introduces. "Jungkook, this is Taehyung, one of our best football players," the principal says to me. "Taehyung can you please take Jungkook to get is text books, and maybe help him get around?" The principal asks. "Sure Mr. Han," Taehyung says flashing him a boxy smile.

Taehyung leads me out the office, he looks at me, "you look familiar," Taehyung says. I just keep looking at the floor, not saying anything. "Like really familiar..." I look up at Taehyung for a second. "Hey, I know you, you were watching our practice yesterday," Taehyung says, giving me his boxy smile. I nod, still not saying anything. I wanted to say something, but the last time I said what was on my mind my father beat me when we got home. "Someones talkative," Taehyung jokes, nudging me. I look up and give him a weak smile.

Taehyung keeps talking to me, I just look at smile for answers. We get to the place to get my text books. Taehyung helps me check them out, "what class do you have first?" Taehyung asks, "English," I say quietly. Taehyung looked at me and smiled again, "you can talk," he joked. I smile, we get to my locker and stuff my new text books in. I stand with my back against the locker. I see Taehyung's friends. Taehyung is about to signal to them, "it's okay, I'll be able to get to English class alone," I assure him, waving him off. Taehyung gives me a worried smile before running off to his friends.

I find my English class and sit down in my seat, waiting for the teacher. Taehyung comes into the class with another one of his friends. I didn't bother to say hello to Taehyung, I didn't want to ruin his fun with my looks. The teacher walks in, "good morning class," she says, rushing around for a bit. She sighs and stands in front of the class, "we have a new student with us today, Jeon Jungkook," she says with a smile. I put my head down. 

"Jungkook?" She asks looking around, I lift my head up and raise my hand, "there he his, please treat him well,"  she says and then goes back to treating the class. Halfway through class my phone buzzes, without even looking I knew my father had gotten drunk and decided to remind me of what a failure I am. I sneakily put my hand in my pocket and turn off my phone so it would stop buzzing. I was sure some people could hear it go off in my pocket.

The bell rings shortly after and I get up, grabbing my books and walk quickly out of the classroom. I get out my timetable, looking at my next double. I stuff my things in my locker and turn my phone on. Messages blow up my phone screen.

Dad

You little shit

Dad

Think you could get out of a beating if you leave early?

Dad

No one loves you

Dad

Your a failure

Dad

You better be home early

Dad 

Fuck you

Dad 

I wish your mother had gotten an abortion

Dad

Your a fucking failure

Dad

Don't even come home

Dad

Your a little shit

I feel someone else's presences with me, I quickly click the power button on my phone, looking up. Taehyung had his hand next to my head and was looking at me. "Someone's popular," he said, "it's not... it's just my Dad," I admit. "Someone's Dad loves them," Taehyung changes. "He doesn't love me." I push past Taehyung, walking down the hall, looking at a couple more of the messages before turning it off and stuffing it in my pocket. I walked outside and sat underneath a tree, pulled a book out my bag and started reading. 

Reading, but my mind was else wear, the little voice in my head speaks to me. I turn the page of the book I wasn't reading. "Your going to ignore how fucking disgusting you are? You have already put on 15 calories today," the little voice whispers. "Just cut, come on, like anyone would care, am I right?" The little voice snarls. I put my head against the tree and sigh deeply, flushing the voice out my head. I already cut enough.