Chasing the bad girl (DTBG spin-off)

Friday (Chapter 5)

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Chapter 5

Monday

River P.O.V

Pain can either carry you afloat, or it can drown you. Usually I let my pain be the one forcing me to move on, in hope one day it will end. Today, today I'm unable to move.

I text Connor that I won't be in school today, I tell him I'm unwell.

What I don't tell him is, that the fear of seeing hundreds of faces today causes me to freeze into the spine of my mattress.

I stare at the white wall above me as I try to murder the image of his hands on my body, his voice. The smell in the room, that never seems to die, the tangy scent of alcohol.

I wish they would stop filtering through to the beautiful parts of my mind, ruining the beautiful white petals-forever marking them like ink on a page.

Something interrupts my thoughts, a phone.

Its ringing.

I ignore it.

I ignore the 10 after that too.

My eyes flitter to the clock 5.52pm. I sigh my eyes flittering to the outside, it was beginning to get dark the grey clouds providing a small amount of shade.

I smile reaching under my bed and reaching for my joy bag. I stand up, pick up my blankets and hit them against the bed three times. I then fold the blanket and place it onto top of the bed.

I retrieve my M&M scarf that hangs on my desk chair and lay that out on-top of my mattress, I sit on the floor and remove the contents of my bag.

Papers. Grinder. Tiny glass pot holding my precious.

I begin to get to work only one thing on my mind, forget. Forget. Forget.

When darkness hits and I'm assured that no neighbors will spot me, I sneak out the back door no longer feeling the rapid heartbeat in my chest that I used to feel.

The fear of my father deciding to come home used to scare the shit out of me, now? That fear is gone.

Dad's always at work.

Once I'm done with that I enter my house, closing the French doors with a lock. I turn on the TV and retrieve the fur throws that my father keeps inside the sofas. I drop the top and bounce onto the sofa. I don't remember how long I'm floating until I finally fall asleep.

Tuesday

I don't remember Tuesday, I never remember Moody Tuesdays.

Wednesday

Wednesday is my first contact with the outside world, my father texts me.

Dad:

Baby-girl, in Tokyo I came to pack saw you on the sofa didn't want to disturb you.

Love you xx

River:

Its ok. Homework's killing me.

Miss you Daddy L I love you x

Of-course you love me, where are you? I snort, I stop my steady walk down the stairs and shake my head at my own bitterness- relax man.

Relax.....rela....reGANJA.

I step back smirking, shit brain.

What are you attempting to tell me?