She's Cold✔️

Chapter Nineteen

Jocelyn avoided Shane for the rest of the day. She was glad when Shane's mother called to say she wouldn't be spending the night. She promptly picked an empty room, and set up camp there.

Shane had been in his study the whole time, and at one point in the night, he had searched for her, calling her name out loudly.

Jocelyn had refused to reply. She had heard him cursing and for the tenth time, maybe, questioned her sanity.

Was she really hiding from him because he had stirred something in her?

Her mind flitted back to that agonizing few seconds in the kitchen. She played a game of what if. What if she had leaned in the exact moment he did? What if he had kissed her? Would she have kissed him back? Would she have liked it? What would it say about her if she did?

She was frustrated and hated finding herself in strange situations. She was twenty four, and had only been kissed once in her entire life, by a sloppy teenager in her messy teenage years.

Was it exactly her fault that she was nervous about what had actually not happened yet? She admitted to herself that there was definitely something between herself and Shane, but the big question was if it was worth exploring. Shane obviously wanted to explore it, that much she already figured out.

He had texted her a few times, asking where she was, and she hadn't replied any of them. He probably wasn't overthinking their situation like she was, and she didn't want to suffer alone. So she finally decided to text back.

Last room on your floor.

Shane knocked on the door a few seconds later.

Jocelyn opened the door feeling utterly foolish. "Sorry, I've been busy," she muttered.

Shane ignored her greeting and pushed the door farther open. He looked around the room. "You've made here yours in a few hours." He nodded at her opened laptop on the bed, her jacket hanging on the back of a chair, the plate of untouched Sandwiches, and the glass of juice.

Jocelyn closed the door behind him and sat on the edge of the bed. Shane pulled out a chair from the desk in front of the window and straddled it, facing her.

She stared at her fingers for a long time before sighing and lifting up her head. "I know I'm quite confusing, and I'm sorry about it," she muttered, looking him straight in the eye.

Shane maintained the eye contact. "Do I make you nervous, Josie?"

"No. But I haven't really ever been in this kind of situation before." Her voice was low.

Liar! She screamed inside. She was a big ball of quivering nerves.

"I like you, Josie," Shane said, still staring at her. His facial expression was unreadable.

Jocelyn laughed, "You can't like me, Shane. You don't know anything about me."

Shane shook his head. "I think you are a frightened kitten under that cool exterior. I'm not sure what it is you've been through that you have to act so strong about. But I like you, crazy as it sounds."

"You're crazy. And what's it with the animal names?" Jocelyn's cheeks reddened, and she held her up her hands to cover her face.

"I just like the little frown you keep giving me when I call you ridiculous names," he smiled and she frowned in confusion, her brows lifting. "Yes, exactly like that!" He laughed.

She blushed again, looking away

"So, do you think we can rectify the situation, about not knowing shit about each other?" He asked.

Jocelyn smiled. Now this she was willing to do. Start slow, try to know him a little better. From the contracts she had revised, they had to stay married for at least five years before a divorce could be discussed. It would be crazier to treat him like a stranger for the duration of their marriage. "Yeah."

Shane grinned, "Great. What were you doing before I came in?"

Jocelyn adjusted the laptop so he could see. "Studying. I have a major exam next week. My finals, actually."

Shane looked surprised. "And you're majoring in marketing?"

"Well, its the best solution to all my problems," she shrugged. "Do you have any siblings?"

"Only child. You?"

"I'm an orphan, kinda. And no, I was an only child."

"Shit, I'm sorry. I should have figured that one out." Shane looked as if he was in a tight spot.

"Its okay. I guess the orphanage would always be better than my home," she smiled warily.

Shane left the chair and came to seat beside her on the bed. "My dad left us to go start a family with his mistress. I was ten then and I was seriously confused. I didn't get why my dad was going to visit some other woman. Then when I did understand, I hated him for making my mom cry. It took till I was sixteen for my mom to stop crying everytime she thought I was asleep."

Jocelyn tried to imagine a smaller Shane, confused and hurt. Her heart went out to him, to the insecure kid he might have been. So unlike her who had known at an early age that there was nothing good about her parent's relationship. And she had come to accept it.

"My mom's friend dropped me off at the orphanage when I was ten. It was the best day of my life," Jocelyn whispered.

"You want to talk about it?" Shane asked, rubbing her knee.

Jocelyn considered her options. She had never told anyone else about what had happened in her family. Only Jason, the boy next door had had an inkling as to what happened. She had never told Ian or Samantha. She knew the only true way to get over her past was to talk to someone about it. She had figured a visit to a therapist would be on her to do list soon. What she didn't think about was talking to Shane about it. He was the last person she should be considering spilling her dark secrets to.

"Maybe. Not today, someday," Jocelyn whispered.

Shane leaned towards her a little. "What if I wanted to kiss you, for real? Would you let me?" His eyes searched Jocelyn's own for the confirmation he needed.

Jocelyn didn't spare it a moments thought. She leaned forward, brushing her lips across his, she didn't pause to question where the sudden bravado came from.

Shane sighed happily, his hands going to the back of her head, holding her in place.

So, that happened.

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