*Slideshow of best moments of Tamaki Live, while ominous instrumental of old theme song plays. (Mental note: The ridiculous words have been completely removed.) Fades in on Tamaki sitting in his throne-like chair. A screen covered in randomly placed dots stands behind him (similiar to that boring talk show with the old guy... Larry King! Yeah, that's his name).*
Tamaki: *Smiles at the sound of recorded applause* Welcome, guests! After a few minor changes, we are back on the air! We hope you enjoy the show we've got planned for today! *Big grin* Our special visitor for today is a near and dear friend of our producer, Hika Sutcliff. KatelynMaeB! *Recorded applause* I was on her show the other day, along with that red-haired pedophiliac reaper, Grell Sutcliff. Yes, I've already interviewed... *hand-wall secret conversation to camera* ...and gone to court... *recorded laughter, back to grinning* ...with Mister Sutcliff, so I decided why not have a host to host episode, eh?
*Recorded applause as Katelyn dances (yes, dances) onto the stage. She does a front flip over the back of her chair, making her land in the seat with a big goofy smile. Tamaki applaudes her wildly*
Tamaki: *Eyes glistening in admiration* What grace! That's an entrance! *Overwhelmed, wiggles (yes, wiggles) like a worm* Why, yes, it's quite obvious you're a host!
Katelyn: Why, thank you Tama-chan! *throws confetti at him randomly*
Tamaki: *confused sweat drop* Uh, thank you...?
Katelyn: What? Didn't you know it's Confetti Day? *recorded laughter*
Tamaki: *Laughs shaking confetti out of his hair sexily (yes, sexily >:3)* Well, I do now!
*Suddenly, thousands of flakes of confetti rain down on him, hitting him all at once. Recorded laughter. He sits there, covered in it, the only thing visible under the pile of paper is the top of his head. Camera pans to Kaoru and Hikaru, doubled over in laughter. Kyoya walks over to both of them, straight faced, grabbing them both by the back of the shirt. The camera pans away as they both start to scream*
Kaoru and Hikaru: *Sounds of smacking and shattering glass* No, Kyoya! Not that! Stop!
*Tamaki is back in view, magically not covered in confetti anymore. He fake laughs, a vein visibly throbbing in his forehead irritably*
Tamaki: Oh, gotta love those twins... Those stupid, idiot twins...
Katelyn: *Stares at him for a moment, looking utterly confused by the whole situation* Uh...
Tamaki: Oh, yes! I almost forgot ya there, Katelyn! *laughs, recorded laughter* So! How are things going with your show?
Katelyn: *smiles* Oh, quite well!
Tama-chan: *waves hand dismissively* My dear, no need to lie to me! I know that retched reaper is dragging you down. And that Sebastian Michaelis, I wanted to file a restraining order on that one too, but my lawyer adviced me that it would do me no good.
Katelyn: *Her jaw drops, amazed at him* Thank GOD, someone who knows what a pain in the ASS Grell is! You know he broke a vase my mother gave me?! *Recorded dramatic gasps of dissapproval*
Tamaki: No kidding? *Leans in, intently listening* Why would he do that?
Katelyn: Because, he got pissed off at poor innocent Finny! The kid accidently breaks an antique, victorean era dresser and Grell's gotta go all ape-shit on my stuff! *More recorded disapproving gasps*
Tamaki: *Propping his chin on his wrist thoughtfully* Oh, little Finnian must have felt awful.
Katelyn: Duh! The kid seemed on the verge of suicide! *waves hands dramatically*
*Before Tamaki can respond, Grell appears on the edge of the set, looking thoroughly confused*
Grell: Katelyn, I couldn't sit in the car anymore, it was getting too hot. I hope it's okay I took off my... *Notices Tamaki* Oh! My beautiful, blonde angel! I'm ready to bare your children, if you will only grace me! *Throws himself across the room, but is abruptly blocked by Honey-sempai, who is glaring at him angrily*
Honey: No bad touch... *scary face*
*Grell backs away slowly, whimpering and hiding behind Katelyn's chair. Recorded laughter. Tamaki confused sweat drops*
Tama-chan: Um, Honey... if your over here, who's running the camera?
Honey: *suddenly cute again* Oosa-chan took over for me! *Smiles and strolls offset*
Tamaki: *Glances at the camera stand and shrugs, satisfied by whatever was holding up the camera* So, as we were discussing before...
Katelyn: Oh, yes! *Smiles* The show has been running smoothly, with the help of Sebastian.
Tamaki: *Shudders* That... Thing works for you too?
Katelyn: Yes, why?
*Once again, Tamaki is inturrupted by a surprise guest, Sebastian. The recorded crowd goes absolutely wild as he strolls up to Katelyn's chair, as sexy as ever.*
Sebastian: *addressing Katelyn* Grell got out again.
Katelyn: *Drags him out from behind her chair, he's still whimpering like a dog.* I know. Jeezus, you are off the ball today, Sebastian. I swear to God, if you lose him again, I'm going to make you give him another bath. I know how you hate doing that.
Sebastian: *literally turns red* Please, Miss MaeB (Acknowledging her lack of last name) Please, don't make me do that.
Grell: *Grins* Oh, Bassy, don't pretend you don't enjoy it.
Katelyn: *Slaps him with a newspaper* Shutup, Grell. You're not part of this conversation.
Grell: What the Hell are you talking about?! I'm the topic of this conversation!
Katelyn: Well, that doesn't mean you're participating in it!
Sebastian: *Straight faced, as usual* Yes, I believe there's a difference between being a topic and discussing a topic.
Katelyn: Thank you, Sebastian.
Grell: *Tears up dramatically* No fair, you two are ganging up on me!
Sebastian and Katelyn (unison): Shutup, Grell! *recorded laughter*
*Close up of Tamaki smiling, sweat drop. Grell, Katelyn, and Sebastian still arguing in the background*
Tama-chan: Well! I do believe we are out of time! See you next time, here on TAMAKI LIVE!
*Begins to fade to black*
Grell: *Still background noise* FUCK YOU, KATELYN!
Katelyn: YOU'RE GAY, YOU IDIOT!
Sebastian: Not that any man would have him...
Grell: Bassy!? Words hurt too, you know! But... You hurt me in all the right ways...
Sebastian and Katelyn: Shut the Hell up, Grell!
*Credits roll*
**** (please enjoy the following advertisement) TO SEE THE SHOW I OFTEN REFERRED TO IN THIS EPISODE, PLEASE READ KatelynMayB's "Katelyn's Random Stories... Stories About Nothing!" ****
YOU ARE READING
Tamaki Live!
FanfictionThe Suoh family has bought a television show, and Tamaki intends to use it to dish out all of the up-to-date gossip in the anime world! Will his personal questions be a little TOO personal? Will he cross a line? Probably. See it here, on TAMAKI LIVE!
