Forgetting • Min Yoongi x Reader

-i.

If I call out to you, it's only because I want to hear an answer, any answer, to validate my existence.

If I call out to you and you don't respond, do I exist?

🐘🐘🐘

Yoongi stared at the line next to the casket of (Y/n)'s family. They were shaking hands with the small crowd that had come out to see her.

"You should be up there, man," Taehyung said, draping an arm over Yoongi's shoulder. "You two were practically married."
Yoongi just sighed. "Emphasis on the practically. No rings, no marriage."

Jin hesitated, looking over at his friend. "Why didn't you guys? You were in love right? You two were together for years."

Yoongi massaged his forehead. "(Y/n) didn't want to," he mumbled. "She didn't want to leave behind a widower."

"Oh." His friends were quiet. They had come to (Y/n)'s wake to support Yoongi since they had known how close the two of them had been, but they hadn't realized that Yoongi, while he had been (Y/n)'s everything, was nothing to the family.

(Y/n)'s brother had given Yoongi a tight smile before thanking him for taking care of his sister, but he hadn't said anything else. None of the family had.

"I don't think they approved," Yoongi said quietly, staring at the line of people who looked like (Y/n).

"Why the hell not?" Namjoon asked, plopping into a seat in front of Yoongi but facing them.

"Because...I don't know. Because she was sick and she needed to focus on her health and there I was focusing on love. I think that's what they think. That I put my love life over my job as caretaker. I think they blame me."

"Why?" Jungkook asked, leaning forward to hear Yoongi since he'd gotten so quiet.

"Because (Y/n) probably put too much effort into trying to make me happy instead of saving it for herself," Yoongi said, looking at the casket. It was closed because (Y/n) was too eaten up by the disease for the funeral staff to make her look like she'd died naturally and peacefully.

It wasn't been natural.

It wasn't peaceful.

"Maybe we shouldn't be bringing all of this up," Jimin said cautiously, scanning Yoongi's face. "It's kind of insensitive."

"No, it's fine. I knew this day was coming. Knew it for a long time." Yoongi ran a hand through his hair and forced himself not to look back at the closed casket. That wasn't how he wanted to remember (Y/n).

Instead he saw the brother glaring at him again.

Yoongi sighed, getting up.

"Are you leaving?" Namjoon asked.

Yoongi nodded. "I've got a fucking headache," he said, turning toward the exit.

"Aren't you going to go up there? You know, kneel and pray or something?" Jin asked, looking back at (Y/n)'s cage, because that's what a coffin is, a cage for the remnants of a trapped person.

Yoongi didn't look back. "I've already said all I needed to say to her and to God too for that matter. I don't think he wants to hear from me again after our last one-sided conversation."

His friends were shocked into silence as he walked out of the funeral home, his hands in his pockets.

He hated wakes.

He hated (Y/n)'s more than most. He knew she would hate it just as much.

But what did he know? He was just the hired help who has done more harm than good, according to her family.

He shook his head before walking home. He'd pick up his car later. For now, he needed to walk to clear his mind.

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