Chapter 32. Agatha's Pledge

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It took a moment for Lilith to adjust to the gloom. Small windows let in only a trickle of light. Between rows of boxes and the looming refrigerator stood Agatha, her eyes glittering in the dark. Behind her, Monika's white teeth sparkled in a dazzling smile. She made a kissing noise and dropped something on the floor. It made a wet smack. Panther produced a sound of sheer doggy happiness, rushed over, and bit into it.

An echo of distant merriment reached them. In the dimness of the kitchen, it seemed unreal that somewhere out there people could enjoy themselves.

"Er, hello," said Lilith, waving her hand.

"Little miss wants to save lives. Zat iz very brave," said Agatha without any preamble.

"I..." Lilith's face turned hot. She felt grateful for the darkness. "Excuse me, but how do you know?"

"I told them," said Ed.

Lilith grabbed his arm and whispered hotly, trying to look as inconspicuous as possible. "You told them what?"

"Everything."

"Everything? Everything, everything?"

Ed nodded, retreating to his old habit.

"And they believed you? I mean, they don't think I'm crazy?" Lilith trembled.

"They've known. All along," he said.

"I suspected. I mean, it's great to hear it confirmed. It's excruciatingly splendid news, but, you know. You could've asked me first."

"Sorry. You were sleeping?" Ed suddenly became very interested in the windows.

"Naturally." Lilith narrowed her eyes and released her hold, fuming. "Once you tell a friend a secret, everyone knows about it."

"We heard little miss needz fire," professed Agatha.

"Shhhh!" shushed Lilith. "Don't say the word!"

Alas. The kitchen shook as if a herd of cows ran across its perimeter. Plates rattled, glasses tinkled.

"Please don't say the word," pleaded Lilith, miming the rest as Ed would. She waved her arms about and moved her lips in an exaggerated manner, hoping it spelled out to everyone, don't talk about fire, the mansion can hear us. Of course, given the darkness of the room, the servants hardly understood what she meant.

The kitchen's tremor didn't seem to phase Agatha one bit. "We want to help," she continued, her eyes glinting. "Zere iz little time. Monika?"

Monika petted Panther who pretended to be an ordinary dog with no extraordinary speaking abilities.

"Monika!"

"Ja, Frau Agatha!" Monika startled, disappeared into a dark corner, and emerged triumphantly, holding a bunch of arm-length iron sticks, their ends wrapped in spongy foam. 

"Are these..." said Lilith.

"Torches. From the circus," said Ed.

Hanging pots clanged. The floor heaved, shaking the stove and the refrigerator dangerously. Lilith reached out to Ed to hold on.

"Well, this is spiffing spectacular. Um. Everyone? Perhaps it's better we talk outside?" suggested Lilith irritably, horror sliding into her stomach.

"Too late," said Ed. "It knows."

All window latches snapped shut as one. Both door locks turned, clicking into place, shutting them off from the rest of the mansion as well as from the way out into the garden.

As if this was not enough, a loud thud outside made them jump. It sounded as if either Rosehead stomped her foot, or an elephant tripped and fell. Then there was a distant shifting of the floors above, indicating either Alfred's victory over the room, or the room's victory over him, or something else. In fact, it sounded suspiciously like someone or something was being ejected into the sky.

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