If twilight characters texted each other

Nessie and Mike

Mike: Wait, back up, you're Bella's daughter?
Nessie: Yeah.
Mike: WTF?!?
Nessie: Um, I'm adopted. So yeah.
Mike: Oh, GEEZ! Bella WAS PREGNANT!
Nessie: Then how the hell would I be seventeen five years later? I'm adopted, idiot!
Mike: Illuminati confirmed.
Nessie: I just give up. I'm done. I give up.
Mike: Wait... oh geez...
Nessie: What are you talking about? Seriously Mike.
Mike: You just texted 6 words. THE SIGN OF THE DEVIL! YOU ARE THE SPAWN OF THE DEVIL!