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I threw my phone across my filthy room. My eyes were black and so was my heart. The sound of the front glass shuttering made me jump. I had never been this sad and angry before. Never. I had to learn how to control myself! My eyes met the shattered glass as I walked towards my phone. I hoped it still worked, cause I had just a couple minutes ago destroyed my last phone. I had to delete Jason in my contacts, I had to fix things, I had to call Justin.... Several tears rolled down both my cheeks. I felt my body lose control of itself as I fell down on the floor. -Ouch! I searched for the phone with my right hand while staring up at the white roof. It was so clean, but still so frightening.
I heard something buzzing so I tried to sit up and find its source. My phone lit up and I took it in my wet hands. It was only a Snap from Chelsea. Phew! I double clicked the home button and swiped away all the apps I had used. Then I saw the convo I had with Jason, and I got furious.
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I texted him one last time and changed his name. I wouldn't let him RUIN EVERYTHING anymore!! I was gonna let him pay for this! He's a fucking idiot! -Amy? Are you there? For a little second I thought that voice was Justin's. But then I remembered what he thought I had done. I remembered the look on his face when he rolled up the window of his rusty car. The tears that carefully slid down his strong jawline and cheeks. I had never seen him so heartbroken. What had I done to deserve this? -Sweetie? It's dinner time! -Coming, mum! I shouted and jogged downstairs. I had to figure out how to get Justin back. I couldn't call him, cause he wouldn't answer. I couldn't go and confront Jason, he would just try to get back together with me. And I would probably let him manipulate me. I wasn't strong anymore. I was weak. Weaker than ever...
-Amy? Are you even listening? My mother looked seriously at me and I didn't know what to say. Actually I just wanted to tell the truth. NO, MUM! I'm not listening! Cause you know what? Justin broke up with me! And it's all because of Jason! Well that's not true, cause I actually wanted to break up with him! It's confusing, and I don't know what to do. I mean, you don't realize how amazing your life and what you have is, until you lose it!
-Amy Jackson! Sit down! NOW! mum said with a gravely voice. -Ok... I'm sorry, I said, looking down on my shoes while I sat down on the cold chair. I was too busy handling my own problems, to realize dad wasn't here with mum. Don't get me wrong, my dad usually is on meetings and job stuff alone somewhere far away, but he usually texts me when he doesn't come home. This worried me, a lot. Me and my father doesn't have the best relationship, but this texting thing kinda was the only thing we did together. It was how we kept in touch. -Eat your food now, Amy! mum yelled. -How do I deal with this girl, ugh, she whispered. She probably thought I didn't hear. But I did, I really did. -What? I put my fork strongly down to the table as I stared into her light blue eyes. I didn't look anything like her, except my hair sometimes. But I didn't care. I didn't want to be like her anyway.
-Nothing, sweetie. Do you want a taste of my salad? It's very good! Suddenly my mum's mood changed. That only happened when she tried to cover something up. -No, actually not, it looks horrible mum. I knew that if she still tried to be nice, she was hiding something. She hated when people said bad things about what she ate. -Yeah, you're probably right, sweetheart. Let's watch a movie tonight, shall we? My mother smiled at me and continued eating her way too green salad. -What's wrong mum? I heard what you said about me, why are you so stressed? I stopped eating and put down my cutlery. -Excuse me? Now my mother stopped eating too. She stared into my eyes and I saw the sadness she tried to hide, so she suddenly looked down again. -Mum, where is daddy? My voice cracked when I said his name and a single tear slipped down my mother's cheek. You could easily see that she tried to keep the tears inside. - I tried, Amy, I really did. My mum started crying her heart out and I ran over to her and hugged her tightly. I knew what had happened now. She didn't need to explain. I kinda felt this would happen someday, somehow. As I've told you before, my family isn't exactly perfect, and this is just another proof of that.
