Baby Craige (SPG)

Chapter 9

Chapter 9: Without Ace.

Zein's point of view

Pakiramdam ko para akong Zombie na wala sa sarili nang gumising ako. Maga na ang aking mga mata ubos na rin ang luha ko. I'm still lying in Mia's bed. Wala akong ganang bumangon gusto kong magmokmok lang dito.

" Zein get up!"sigaw ni Mia na nasa salas."you don't need to prison yourself."sigaw nito na ngayon nasa pintoan at sumisilip sakin. Mukhang timang.

"I dont want to. Just leave me muna please."walang gana kong sabi.

"Oh. Come on Zein..."hinawakan niya ako sa braso saka hinatak ako upang makatayo.

"ayoko."walang gana kong sabi. Saka kumawala sa pagkakahawak niya saking braso. I cover my whole body with blanket. Hinatak niya iyon.

"Ano ba Mia!"I nodded. Saka tumayo at lumabas na wala man lang paalam. Nakakainis kasi si Mia. San ba kasing lugar ang tahimik! Yung ako lang mag-isa para naman makapagisip ako ng maayos. Naglalakad lang ako from nowhere. I don't know where my feet bring me. Basta ang alam ko lang gusto kong mapagisa muna.

"ouch!" Binunggo lang naman ako ng di ko kilalang tao."hoy!" Sigaw ko. He stopped saka umaatras papunta sakin na nakatalikod. Hindi ko alam pero pakiramdam ko kilala ko siya. Then he face me with a sweet smile.

"Woah. Hi Zein, how did you get here?" Tanong nito.

"It's none of your business, we'll.. I'm fine I think so." I sarcastically smiled. He chuckled. Whats wrong with this guy?

"Problema mo? What's funny?"I nodded.

"Masungit ka parin ano? Anyways.. I guess your not fine as well.. look at yourself para kang wala sa sarili mo."he chuckled. Saka tinignan ako mula ulo hanggang paa. Kumunot ang noo ko sa sinabi niya. Well kung sa bagay tama siya. Wala ngako saking sarili. I look at myself. tsk.. I just wear a pajamas with loss tshirt matching slippper with face of Dora. Sige pagtawanan niyo ako KIBbabies.

"Well.. your right!"malungkot kong sabi.

"Oh. Bat bigla kang malungkot jan? Halika umupo muna tayo." Umupo kami sa may bench na may katabing puno. Bigla akong nakaramdam ng bigat saking dibdib.

"Tell me. Whats your problem."he said with a worried tone on it. I turned my head to face him.

"Panget ba ako?" Tanong ko sakanya. Nagulat ito sa ginawa ko ng napalapit ko pala ang mukha ko sakanya agad naman akong lumayo. He cleared his throat before he could talk.

"Um.. n-No! Of course no. Yan ba yung problema mo?"He chuckled. Kanina pa tong lalaking to ah! Nakakainis na yung mga ngiti niya!

"No.. it's about my boyfriend."pangunguna ko."I just--"I deep sighed."I just - don't understand. I don't understand everything. He hide a thousand secrets but I just-- I just don't care about that I don't care who he is, where he from, what kind of person he is. Basta ang alam ko I love him. I love him more than he know. But... bakit ganun kahit ako na ang umiintindi, ako pa ang iniwan. Am I not enough? Kulang pa ba yun lahat? Siya lang yung hindi ko maintindihan. Ewan ko na. Hindi niya ba nararamdaman ang nararamdaman ko? Tao rin ako na marunong masaktan sa tuwing hindi niya sinasabi ang mga problema niya at lalong para siyang walang tiwala sakin.." hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili ko na umiyak. Xavier hug me.

"Shh.. you know hindi lahat ng babae marunong umintindi, kaya yun ang dapat intindihin ng lalaki. Okay Zein? Hindi sa lahat ng oras ikaw ang umiintindi."he said and cupped my cheek."Kung mahal ka nga talaga niya di ka niya kailanman bibitawan, dahil lang sa napakasimple at walang kwentang dahilan."he nodded.

"Pero.. kilala ko si Ace. Hindi siya basta basta bumibitaw sa walang kwentang dahilan. I know him. Alam kong pinoprotektahan niya lang ako.."I cried. He wipes my tears. Umiwas ako ng tingin at lumayo ng kunti sa kanya. He let out a deep sighed.

"You know Zein.. yung akala mo alam muna lahat sa kanya yung akala mo kilala mo na siya. But most of us has a secrets na hindi natin kayang sabihin."he throw a serious face at me. I blinked when I realize that I almost swallowed his eyes.

I keep in silence. Hindi naku nagsalita at tumayo na para puntahan si Ace sa opisina niya. But before I could get away he hold my wrist that's why I was face him just a inch away from him. I could feel his breath and scent his perfume. It was different from Ace. He has the hard scent, but Ace was really natural but really filled your nose that you can't even want to smell anything. Ace scent is my drug. He is different and I love it. I shook my head and pushed him gently.

"Sorry." He said."I- I'm sorry." He said. Saka ako umalis.

He's my friend. I know. pero bakit nakaramdam ako ng kakaiba sakanya? Ano to? No. I don't need to mind that guy who does'nt I ever know his life or even personality. All I could need to think now is about me and Ace. Pumunta ako sa opisina ni Ace at eksaktong hindi nakalock ang pinto. Lagi kasing nakalock to lalo na pag busy siya ayaw niyang dinidistorbo siya. When I was about to open the door I've heard a girl voice.

"Ah. Sir. Ouch." Girl moaned. Oh my ghad! It cant be! Nanginig ang tuhod ko at kamay sa naririnig ko. Gusto kuna sanang humakbang palayo at tumakbo pero bakit parang bumigat ang mga ito.

"Shh! Shut up!"it was Ace voice.

"Dahan dahan lang po. Ugh!" Hindi ko na kaya tinakpan ko nang dalawang kamay ang aking mga tainga. Pero kahit anong gawin ko naririnig ko parin sila.

"Shit! Shut up! Might someone heard us!" It was Ace. My tears starts to fall down.

"No Ace.."I whispered to myself. Uupo na sana ako sa sahig ng biglang may humawak saking beywang at niyakap ako.

"Shh.."

"Why is this happening!"I cried. He hold my hand para makalayo sa pintuang yun.

"Bat ka andito?"I cried.

"I'm just worried about you. Kaya I decide na sundan ka at tama nga ako na mangyayare to. Zein.. he did not deserve you. Hindi pa ba Sapat yun para hindi muna siya mahalin? Maraming lalaki jan Zein. Bakit nagtitiis yang puso mo sa taong ayaw na sayo!" He angryly said.

"Anong pinagsasabi mo? Bat ka nagkakaganyan?"I nodded.

"Zein. You need some better to love you. at hindi siya ang taong yun." He said saka hinawakan ang dalawang braso ko. Hindi ko na alam ang gagawin mas lalo niya lang akong pinapalito.

"I can't even love someone if my heart beating just for Ace." I said in a lowered tone. He let out a deep sighed. Inalis ko ang kamay niya sa pagkakahawak niya saking braso saka naglakad palayo.

Naglalakad ako sa kawalan. Hinahagip ng malakas na hangin ang aking buhok habang humahampas ang  mga ito saking buong katawan. It was already night but I can't still find myself I don't know where my feet bring me. Wala ako sa sarili ko ngayon. Hindi ba nag alala si Ace sakin? Kanina yung Narinig ko nageeco parin sa utak ko. I roamed my head and my eyes pay attention towards the bar. So I decide to go there. I drank myself. I just want to forget this even if just for a while.

"Let's cool off"

That word comes out into my mind. I can't understand why. It is just like you gave me wings and then you told me it's illegal to fly.. I miss him.

I'm not named Zein without Ace.