Sweet Little Lies

Ch.22 Hello? Its me...

    Harper Morgan
    Once we get back to The West End I find Ajax in the barn talking to Thomas Gains, the local veterinarian about Bella a beautiful horse who looks to be very pregnant. I wait for them to finish and as soon as Tom leaves, I tell him about the lunch I just had with his mother. "Your Ma was very talkative at lunch today."
He chuckles, knowingly. "When doesn't she have something to say?"
"She wanted to know if we had sex yet." I state, getting the reaction I anticipated.
"Jesus! What did you say?" He ask, shocked.
I throw up my hands. "I couldn't even talk I was so surprised by the question, but I didn't need to answer because she said she already knows." I tell him. Hoping he feels at least half as uncomfortable as I did when she said it.
"Mind if we talk about something else? I just ate." He asks, turning to Bella and rubbing her down. I smile knowing, he is feeling the awkwardness.
I decide to bite the bullet and tell him about Remmy's offer in Flagstaff. "Remmy, offered me a job in Flagstaff heading up the accounting decision at one of his families companies."
This gets his attention and he turns to me. "Where is he?" He questions, seriously his hands dropping from Bella.
"In the house, probably." I answer, honestly. He starts to head quickly to the house and I realize my mistake. "Wait, Ajax! Do not touch him!" I yell, worried.
He turns towards me so fast I run into him. "Don't touch him? That piece of shit is gonna get the ass kicking I should've given him the day he showed up."
"I want to talk about this! I didn't tell him I'd take the job." I explain.
"But you're considering it, or you wouldn't of told me." He replies.
I shake my head. "Its just tempting, thats all." I say, but I know he's right. As soon as Remmy brought up working for big company I felt excited. Like I might do something more demanding of my education and time. Its not that I'm unhappy being back home. Sure, I expected my family to have missed me, a lot more than they did, then again they're not really the smothering parents like Ajax has.
Time with Ajax has been mostly wonderful and I do care about him. I see myself with him in the long run, but to settle down now? While I'm fresh out of college, at his Ranch just isn't what I thought it was going to be.
"Why the hell did you come back, if you were just going to leave again?" He asks, bitterly. I can see the hurt and I hate that I'm responsible for it.
"I didn't say I was leaving." I tell him, stepping closer to him.
"But you haven't said that you weren't, either." He points out.
I stare at him, feeling conflicted. He turns around and starts walking towards the house again. "If I did. Would you go with me?" I ask, simply out of curiosity. Knowing I could never ask him to do that for me.
He stops walking, but doesn't turn to face me. "Are you asking me to?" He questions, stunned and a little confused.
"No, you'd hate it. I could never ask you to." I answer, quietly. We stand like that for a few seconds, both of us not knowing what to say.
He finally faces me. "I'm not going to ask you to stay either." He states, firmly.
"I understand." I nod, feeling my heart sink in my chest. "I don't want to leave." I remind him.
He runs his hands over his face, in frustration or exasperation, I'm not sure which. "Why don't you take think what it is you do want. If you stay here its church, work, marriage and kids. If thats not what you want, then I guess I'll see you in another four years." He walks past me and back into the barn.

Ajax West
    It hurt walking away from her. Thank God that snake she calls a friend has left. I really don't think I could stop myself from killing him. I knew the moment I saw him he was here for her, I just didn't think he'd succeed. Enticing her with a job offer at a company his family owns is just low, sneaky and low. I should've seen this coming. She was making changes on the first day she was here. Her job at The West End isn't a challenge for her, it was a walk in a very boring park. I don't blame her, I don't. If I went to school and got a degree I'd want to use it, not sit behind a desk wishing I was working somewhere else. Frankly, I know the feeling and its draining.

    Walking out to the barn after dinner I pace up and down the row of stalls. The urge to call her is strong, but I don't want to pressure her into a decision. I wish I could say something to change her mind, but there's nothing. Deciding I have to call, even if it's just to say goodnight. I grip the phone tightly, "Hi." She answers, sounding upset. Immediately my head tells me shes leaving. I sigh, wishing now that I hadn't called. "I was just about to call you." She states.
"Why?" I ask, simply. Not wanting her to hear my fear.
"Just to hear your voice, really." She replies, sweetly.
I run my hand through my hair anxiously. "I know what you mean. Thats why I called." I confess, but really I want to beg her to stay.
There's a moment of silence before she says, "I talked to your father today. He said I could keep working until I decide what I want to do. Although, I think your Ma was pretty upset at him for it."
"Harp, don-..." Stoping myself in time, I say, "I should go."
"Do you have to?"
I chuckle, painfully. "Yeah, if I don't I'll regret it."
"One question, before you go. Please."
"What is it?" I ask, reluctantly.
"What did you mean you'd see me in another four years if I left?"
I take a deep breath, "Come on, Harp. What do you think it means? It means exactly that. I'll see you in four years. I'm not going anywhere and I'm not stupid enough to think anyone can replace you. If you don't want to be here and want to take that job, I'll support you. I wont like it, but I'll deal with it. Once you're ready to come home, I'll be waiting."