Harrison Avenue // H.S.

All I Want for Christmas

[Ellison]

The window is frosty, fogged up on the inside so that the lights pinned to the buildings outside sort of blur just the same as the noise in the pub blurs together in my head. It's Christmas, well, Christmas Eve and we're in Harry's hometown, fulfilling a tradition he does any time he's home for the holidays. Matt is with us, he's the one sitting next to me on tall stools in the corner with the windows that we both keep staring out. Harry is... somewhere. Truthfully I haven't seen him for close to thirty minutes.

Harry and I haven't spent every Christmas together, not in the early years at least. Our first Christmas was the one that followed days after his arrival in New York and that one was just for us... we ate take out Thai food and tried to stay warm in my apartment that had zero heating and Harry went and bought some lights because he kept complaining about my lack of a festive attitude.

Since then it's been a somewhat irregular pattern. I've spent Christmas in Brookings while he was in England, he's come home with me to Brookings, we've spent it in New York with Mo and our other friends. The last two years though I've gone with him to England and this time we had an almost brand new baby along for the ride, plus Matt. He flew to New York the week before to spend some long awaited time with Dylanne (and Harry and me too of course) and then we all sat on a plane for hours and then took two trains with a baby who cried a little too much... but we were determined to get the four of us here, and we accomplished that.

Now Dylanne is spending the night in with Grandma Anne and Auntie Gem while Matt, Harry and me walked to the pub Harry regulars around Christmas time. Matt is on his third beer, and I'm trying to make my first last while he's telling me about this girl he's been seeing in California.

We came here last year as well, only Matt wasn't with us. Harry introduced me to so many people that I had to hide in the bathroom for a half hour so he couldn't introduce me to any more. Everyone kept patting Harry on the back because his music has reached significant success and they all seemed to be proud of him for that and I eventually drank enough to pretend I was friendly.

We had some hellish hangovers Christmas morning.

This year I can't drink to quite that excess, considering I'm breastfeeding Dylanne and that is one of the things I have to be mindful of, but it doesn't feel as necessary because Matt is here so I can catch up with my childhood friend as Harry catches up with his.

"I'm so happy we're spending Christmas all together," Matt says, hiccupping a little before he takes a long drink from the pint in his hand. "Did you ever think when we were in high school that we would be family someday, Elle?" he laughs and I immediately shake my head.

"Nope," I tell him, setting the pint in my hand down. "But I was also in denial that we were even friends then, Matty. I'm just glad you stuck around."

"Now look at us, you've got a baby with my cousin and you're insanely in love, it's permanent now, Elle... we are going to be friends when we're a hundred years old," Matt leans a little closer to me, his eyes starting to get a little glazed over with the alcohol.

"You think we'll last that long?"

"Surely," he nods his head with a chuckle. "It's the future, Elle. We'll probably be at peak health at that point... do you miss Dylanne?" he asks, casually fading into that question like he can see into my mind and what's been coming and going in circles since we've got here.

"Yeah," I nod my head, but smile still. "I'm normally only away from her for maybe an hour or two at a time, it's a bit strange to be out... I haven't done that since she was born. It's nice though, and it's very Christmas-y in here, your sweater helps," I nod to his chest, referencing his gaudy patterned red and green sweater he's wearing.