Knotted up (Sasunaru fanfic)

My eyeliner is running

♪───__O__───♪
Sasuke's P.O.V :3

After slipping in my knee socks and falling on the ground, Naruto didn't come to me. Instead, I watched as Naruto ran away from me, the back of his blonde head exiting the frame of my view. It was as if a melinium had passed and I was frozen in place, unable to do a thing.

What have I done?

My body couldn't get up. The solid floor felt cold against the palm of my hand.

I knew deep down there was no use running after Naruto; I was in a silky, pink maid dress and by the time I'd taken it off and changed back to run after him, he'd already be long gone from the school.

What was I thinking?

Why would I expose myself here of all places?

That was so stupid. I'm... so stupid.

But.. I couldn't help it.
As we cleaned the tables, I noticed the dresser they were in. I peeked inside and I wanted to try all of them on. They were crafted so well and all I got to wear the entire festival was a lame ass suit. Sure, i looked great in it; other people were amazed how handsome I looked, but something about those dresses caught my eye. The fragile laces on the front, the silky ribbon adorning the dress.I wanted to try on the dresses the moment I saw them, and this was my last chance to try them on before they were taken away.

Still, why did I do such horrible things? All for the sake of this weird hobby of mine.

I lied to Naruto about everything.
I toyed with his feelings for Sasu-chan and made him confused about which one of us he liked more because I was a selfish bastard, and yet we were the same f*cking person the whole time!
I should have told him the truth about me, but I didn't, because this is exactly what I feared would happen.

I clenched my fists in anger at myself, slamming my hand against the cold floor. I could never forgive myself for what I did, and I couldn't expect Naruto to forgive me, either.

I should've expected this to happen. Bad things happen to bad people.
Maybe it's for the better.

I don't deserve Naruto anymore.
I don't deserve happiness.
I don't deserve anything good, anyone who truly loves me.
For the first time in my life, I fell in love. But this was such a twisted love. I created a love triangle, with two people being myself.
Haha, what the hell am I doing?
Maybe it's better this way; Naruto will be so much happier without me around. He'll find a nice girl to marry who will treat him wonderfully. He'll love her and completely forget about me.

Warm tears fell onto my palm.

No, I don't want that to happen. I can't live without him.

I took the light pink dress off as quickly as I could. The lace got caught in the zipper and before thinking about it, I tore the rest of it off. I held in my hand a ruined dress. I would never dream of doing such a thing in my life, but I had bigger concerns than a torn piece of cloth.

I put on my other clothes from before then walked out of the classroom.
I took deep breaths and tried to calm myself down.

"It's okay," I whispered to myself out loud. Naruto said he'd never hate me. Maybe I can explain things to him and everything will go back to normal. We can get through this, together.

...Right?

I ran all the way to the cafe
My lungs felt like they were on fire from running so fast but I refused to stop; my legs wouldn't let me.

I'm sorry Naruto. I'm so sorry.
Please forgive me.

I yelled these words in my head repeatedly, as if he could hear me telepathically, but no matter how hard I tried yelling, I got no reply back from him.

I dropped to my knees and panted, gazing up at the bright cafe lights that lit up the store. I held my chest and stood up again. I shuffled through my bag and grabbed a key out of it with my trembling hand. My tomato keychain jingled as I stuck the key in and unlocked the door.
I walked inside and heard nothing.

The pure silence alarmed me, but it was already kind of late in the night.

I'm gonna talk to Naruto now. What if he really does call me a gross person? I mean, He ran away from me. He must think I'm disgusting, right?
I glanced down at my hands as warm tears fell onto them.

"Fuck..." I whispered to myself. My eyeliner is running.
I wiped the tears off of my eyes with my sleeve and untied my shoes. I stood up and proceeded down the hall of doors.
I passed mine and fear and anxiety filled me up as I got closer and closer to Naruto's door.

I touched the doorknob and clenched it.

Should I pull it? No, don't pull it. You have to pull it. Open it, you coward!

I couldn't decide what to do; Thinking hurt.
I stepped back from the door and tapped my foot.
You have to face your problems head on.
I faced the door and opened it while frantically looking inside.
Nothing.
I entered Naruto's room and scanned it for any blondies. There were none.
I walked over to the couch and looked at the empty ramen cups on it. I glanced over at the bed and thought I saw a lump, so I ran over and yanked the blanket off.
"I'm so sorry, Naruto!" I yelled before opening my eyes and seeing nothing but pillows.
I clenched my teeth and sat down on the mattress.
"Where the hell are you, Naruto?"