Hey everyone,
I know I suck for not having updated soon and I don't want to bore you with what's been happening in my life. Hopefully I can get up another chapter before the end of this month, but sadly I can't promise anything.
Hope you like the chapter, please comment to tell me if you do!
Vote and Comment
xoxo Natasha <3
Jack was mad.
At me.
And everyone knew it too.
Only Rian, Zack, and Rian knew why though. They were mad at me too, they just didn’t show it like Jack did.
I totally got it too, I would be mad if I were them. I just couldn’t explain it; why I could forgive someone who had beaten me for a year but I couldn’t forgive four guys who treated me like family. Actually I knew why I couldn’t forgive them, I couldn’t forgive myself for the way I had been acting toward them. I mean I was still am still mad that they abandoned me at that party, but it was mostly because I had been nothing but a bitch to them.
The worst part was what it was doing to my son. He was upset over the fact that his mom and dad weren’t talking, that his dad was obviously mad at me but he didn’t know why.
I didn’t think that Jack being mad at me was such a big thing, but it made me feel absolutely terrible. I had to apologize to him if not for what I’ve done to him, at least for the sake of Liam.
We were staying in a hotel after our show today, our tour managers had put Liam and I in a room next to Jack and Alex. After our show we all went out to get something to eat and then went back to the hotel.
I decided that I would talk to Jack after I put Liam to bed, I had overhead Alex saying that they were going to go out and Jack say that he just wanted to stay in. This would probably be my only chance to speak to him privately. I wasn’t exactly sure what I was going to say to him but I was going to talk to him regardless.
“Hey, Spencer we’re going now.” Kat said to me. “Are you sure you don’t want to come? Jack is staying so he could watch Liam.”
“Naw,” I said. “I’m cool, maybe next time.”
I waited an hour before I went to Jack’s room. I knew that Liam would sleep through the night, since he had been exhausted from today.
“Jack?” I said. “Can I come in?”
I waited for an answer, but instead he just opened the door. He looked at me with an expression that told me to say what I wanted and leave.
“Can I please come in?” I asked. “I need to talk to you and it may be long.”
He sighed and moved aside to let me in. I went over and sat on the couch, he came and sat in the other chair.
“I know that you’re mad at me because I could forgive Jason, but not you.” I said. “And you have every right to be and not only because of that. I have been a complete and total bitch to you for the last couple months and not much better since we started this tour. I just couldn’t let go of what you did to me in high school and I know that it was years ago, but I had never let anyone in as much as I had the four of you guys.
“After you stopped talking to me, it made me feel horrible. I didn’t think that it would, but it did. And I realized that I couldn’t forgive you or the guys, because I couldn’t forgive myself and how I had treated you all. You were nothing but nice and I just threw it back in my face, I blew up at every little thing. But that is because I am still that insecure girl, I still feel like I’m doing everything wrong and everything is my fault. As much as I hate to admit it, that teenage girl is still in me, it’s a small part but it’s there.”
