Chasing Amy

Chapter Two

“Are you sure you won’t come with us?” Katie asked as her hands worked to pile her long brown curls atop her head.

Amy sipped at her coffee and stared at Katie with raised eyebrows.  “Do you seriously have to ask that?”

Lori reached out and tugged on Amy’s hand.  “It’ll be fun.  Maybe do you some good.”

“You love dancing!” Katie reminded her.  “You and Ty used to tear up the dance floor when we went to Wild Bill’s.”

Amy gave Katie a sad smile.  “Used to is the important concept here.  Ty and I aren’t together and I’ve got no desire to shake my tushy.  Maybe someday I will, but not today.”

“Oh Amy, I wish there was something I could do to help.” Katie crooned.  She glanced down the street to where Toby and Ty stood with a couple other guys, waiting for her and Lori.  “I wish you would let us help.”

Amy was not getting into this, especially on the streets of State College.  “You guys just go and have a good time.  Keep Ty and Toby with you, stay safe.  I’ll be fine.”

Lori and Katie both stared at her with the same expression, as if there was so much more they wanted to say but knew it was useless.  Finally, Lori reached for Katie’s hand, saying, “Come on Katie.  Let her go.”

Katie gave her a wave as they walked away.

Amy watched them go, leaning against the clock that graced the sidewalk.  They stopped and she saw Toby say something to Lori.  Lori just shook her head.  Amy knew it was about her.  She turned away, not wanting anymore puppy dog eyes and woeful glances in her direction.

She made her way across the street and back on to campus, heading for the dorm.  Thankfully it wasn’t real far from the main drag.

Everything Katie had said was true: Amy used to love dancing.  She knew just about every line dance out there and if she didn’t, she learned quickly.  She and Ty were good at two-stepping, so much so that people had cleared the floor just to watch them move.  But she wasn’t limited to country music.  She loved anything with a good beat and clean lyrics.

But that desire, that passion, had been buried under the grief just like everything else when her Dad died.  It seemed like it would never get better, never end.  Like she’d be in this personal hell forever.  It sucked.  For a while she had believed, the same as everyone else, that it would just take time.  That eventually the pain would fade and she’d go back to enjoying life the way she used to.  But it hadn’t happened yet.  To her it seemed that those on the outside had the impression she was choosing to be this way. 

Amy snorted.  Yeah, right.

She would give anything to dig herself out of this depression, to feel like a normal human being again.  She had barely made it through her last semester of college to graduate.  She couldn’t sleep, couldn’t concentrate, couldn’t study.  Thankfully Ty had been there to coach her along, try to keep her focused enough to get to graduation.  She was deeply indebted to him and yet couldn’t find the emotion to express her gratitude.  Instead, she had dumped him.

Wow, Amy, can you go any lower?

She didn’t have her Dad to run to and she had no desire to take it up with God.  She felt like she’d be lost forever.

Amy sighed and sipped at her coffee again.  So much thinking.  So little answers.  But she didn’t have the desire to do anything else.  Wallowing didn’t take much energy.

She reached the dorms and headed inside, deciding to stop and see what the lounge/game room had to offer.  The building was eerily quiet and Amy was sure she was the only one left in the entire place.  She flipped on the lights and watched as the fluorescent bulbs flickered to life.  A few empty vending machines, two pool tables, an air hockey game and a foosball table greeted her.  And in the corner a large flat screened TV with a few sofas and chairs.