A Clever Reply

To Those People Who You Don't Even Know, You Just Hate

I know. There's always that one person who just INFINITELY pisses you off, but you have no idea what to say to, and you hardly know them. Well, initially, just wait it out. You might find out that you actually like the person, and hey! You can actually be friends. In the case that you have, and you still can't bring yourself to like them...

Well, Mama YouWereWrong is gonna teach you how to rip their shit:

1. Learn how to give the cold shoulder. If you're a sweetie pie cutie bug like me, you can't help being nice to me. Sometimes what's best is to just stare at them blankly if they confront you. Don't talk to them. Don't say anything. Just. Stare.

2. Next, learn to be assertive. If, perhaps, you go to school with this person (which I assume most of you do), get a backbone and slap 'em in the face. Not literally. Classy ladies and gentlemen such as ourselves are always willing to destroy our enemies, but you gotta be cute and sweet about it. Stress your innocence, and never faulted in your speech. Plan out what you're gonna say, and say it well.

Example:

Them: *insert some stupid, irrelevant comment that just irks you*

You: Ah... Sorry, I didn't know the lesser race had an opinion on this matter, too.

It makes it even better if you're the quiet type - that just gives you an edge. But you idiots better not go off picking fights and being unnecessarily rude. I don't want to have to beat one of your asses.

3. Natural wit is always excellent. If you have the ability to think up stuff on the spot, you're good to go. If not, feel free to refer to my previous list of insults as reference. Remember, always be prepared with rebuttals - if they're smart, too, you might be fucked.

Well.

That ended early.

... I guess it's just you and I.

So... Do you like wine? How do you feel about classical music?

...

Wanna hear a joke.

How many tickles dose it take to make an octopus laugh.

Ten-tickles.

Say it out loud if you don't get it.

K. I'm leaving now.

Have a good day, judgmental pricks.