A Beginner's Guide To Christmas

Boxing Day: The Boxing Day Buffet

'Ruth, love, can you come here for a few minutes?'

Yes! Yes! Yes! I'd been playing with the kids all morning so it was a relief when Mum called me into the kitchen. Though once I arrived, I knew I'd be stuck in there for more than a few minutes.

'Can you butter that pile of bread for me? I can't manage with one hand.'

Oh, you mean that mountain of bread over there? How many people was she expecting? Still, it was better than playing Mouse Trap and princesses and dumper trucks.

Mum always hosted a buffet on Boxing Day, inviting what seemed like the whole street as well as Uncle Ray and Aunty Pat and the Demon Twins. My young cousins, Philip and Lesley, weren't actually twins but they had definite demon tendencies.

Lesson 24: Never leave your phone unattended while your delinquent cousins are visiting. They will read out every X-rated text message on there. And enjoy your humiliation.

'Not like that, Ruth. You're putting way too much butter on. Like this.' I could see where Riley had got her perfectionist gene from. And I could also see Mum's wrist was getting better.

I made a million sandwiches and set out the buffet practically single-handedly. Dad was supposed to be giving me a hand but he spent more time scoffing pork pies than he did helping.

'How's the loft coming on?' I asked as I made a start on the crisps and cakes.

Dad dusted the pie crumbs from his fingers. 'Grand, love. Your mum won't let me work on it today but I tell you, I'll be hiding up there as soon as your Aunty Pat gets here.'

'Can I join you?'

Dad chuckled and grabbed a mini roll. There would be nothing left of the buffet by the time the guests arrived.