My Glass Angel

Chapter 9: Numb

Snow felt broken. Everything in her life was breaking down piece by piece and she had no way to stop it. She was in fact partially to blame. 

It was her fault she had quit her job, but she needed to do that to be with her family. She needed to be with her father before he... before he died. And Rain would need her. She couldn't just go to work and leave him by himself after their dad passed. 

Snow saw Ryan in school sometimes, but she was good at avoiding people. Whenever she caught a glimpse of him, she skirted away. She didn't want to face him because she didn't want to face her own mistake. In being apart from him, she realized she might've had feelings for him, but it wouldn't be fair to him to admit that after quitting. 

She didn't even want to admit it to herself. Snow just kept telling herself that he wouldn't want a weeping, broken girl like her. She was shattered and there would soon be no putting the pieces back together. 

"Snow!" Ryan called her name in the hall, but she moved away quickly. She caught glimpses of Casey every now and again, and got the feeling Casey was helping her out a bit. Maybe she was talking to Ryan or distracting him, but she was doing something. 

They were much more alike than Snow would've ever guessed. 

Snow knew she didn't have long with her father. A week passed and he was getting sicker. He was barely awake at all now and couldn't function properly. His eyes were hollow and his breathing was almost always heavy. 

Snow and Rain continued to watch over him and care for him, but there came a point when they both just knew. He continued to tell Snow to go back to work, but even he could barely joke. 

It was nice to spend that last week with him. 

Snow and Rain sat with their father on Sunday night. It was quiet. They had both tried to convince their father to stay in the hospital so his death could be painless, but he insisted on staying home. He said he wanted to stay with them. 

At some point, he said to them, "Snow. Rain."

The two of them perked up. His voice was weak. 

"What is it dad?" Snow asked with concern. 

He swallowed and looked up at her. "Will you both lay with me?"

Snow took in a breath. "Of course," she said in a whisper. 

She gestured to Rain who crawled in the bed on his left side. Snow crawled over to his right, both of them laying by his side. 

"I've got my two kids here with me," he said with a scratchy voice. "What more could anyone want... Rain... my son. You've watched over me constantly."

Rain looked up to see their dad, tears streaming down his face. 

Their dad patted his hair weakly. "Don't cry on me now Rain. Your sister needs you to be strong. You're the man of the house now."

Rain cried even harder. "Don't tell him that," Snow said in a motherly tone. "Rain... men are allowed to cry too." 

Their dad chuckled slightly. "Of course they are. Women like men who cry."

Rain smiled a little, but Snow felt the tears go to her eyes. She wasn't sure how she would keep living without her dad.

"And my beautiful little Snowflake." He turned his attention to her. "You've had to grow up much too fast. I'm so sorry for that."

He touched her face slightly. "You've taken care of everyone. You stay strong Snow, and remember it's ok to accept help. You don't always have to be alone."