The Weeknd

Scared

We slept and slept, and had mind blowing sex. It had been complete weeks of it, I even had a toothbrush in his bathroom. I woke up feeling dizzy, and nauseous. Without thinking about it, I ran to the bathroom to the nearest toilet and released a demon so strong in my stomach. Abel comes running in, half naked, consoling me. "You ok?" He asked worried. I lifted my head up from the toilet, my eyes began to clear up from the tears and I looked around the detailed oriented bathroom that had a serious feng shui. "I'm fine." I replied slowly. Abel soon then walks out the bathroom leaving me there. I felt far from drained, and a little hungry. I get up, and brushed my teeth. As I walked out on to the cold marble floor to the main area kitchen. I see Abel leaning against the counter with his head hunged down. I walk up to him and hug him. "What's wrong?" I asked looking into his dreadful eyes... "Rahslyn.. could you be pregnant?" I unleashed my arms around his waist still staring into his glossy eyes. I never seen him so concerned to where he stared so hard into my eyes, he could see my soul, and question if I was pregnant. "I-I-I don't know... but I mean, it would not kill us to find out." He finally took his eyes off mine and they began to wonder around the room. "Get dressed, and I'll..." Abel takes a deep breath..."Take you to a clinic." Not sure of what to say to him, I walk away slowly into the bedroom area where my clothes were. Abel goes into the bathroom & showers. I sat on the bed waiting and thinking, and thinking. 'I been smoking and drinking and having sex! I can't possibly be pregnant.' I keep telling my self. He gets on in just a towel. An awkward silence is intimidating to me. I still say nothing, as he begins to walk in my direction, still sitting down he kisses me passionately while holding his towel closed. Walks away and begins getting his clothes on. "If you are pregnant let's hope for a boy." He says jokingly. I smiled slightly as the joke made me. I never really thought about getting pregnant. I never used a condom and I never thought about birth-control. How stupid can I be?

During the drive I realize that Abel isn't fit for fatherhood. His life is a dark twisted fantasy. No kid needs to be brought into his world. His kids are his fans, he has to feed them music in order to bring him income. I guess I should've stayed my ass in college, and not follow behind and R&B star. I am immediately regretting everything, I'm officially in debt because of my college tuition, and the car I've wrecked. It's slowly breaking me down, but I also realize that Minnie is no longer my best friend we haven't spoke in weeks,probably been a month already. If I am pregnant, I wonder how she would feel about it. Probably disappointed that I didn't fulfill my dreams first.
We arrive at the clinic and Abel helps me out of the car. Walks me inside while holding my hand, still silent.
"Hi um, my girl needs a pregnancy test?" Abel looks at me and smiles gently. "Hold on one moment and we'll be right with you." We walk over to the chairs and sit, he hadn't let go of my hand yet. I feel like he may be nervous about this to be honest.
"Rahslyn, you're up hunny." Says the nurse gesturing me to come to the back. Abel waits in the lobby while I'm getting the exam....

My eyes filled with tears, and without a doubt I made a decision to leave Abel behind in his life. For I almost thought, I was bound to Abel with a kid.. A pregnancy scare is all it took. I'm not fit to be a mother, cause I still follow behind this man. But seeing him in my future is hard to imagine.

In the car he awaits the news.
"So? Was I right?" "No, I'm not pregnant, but we need to talk." Abel looks at me with relief and concern. I never been so unprepared to dumb someone before, especially someone rich and famous. I can feel myself choke up a little inside as he looks at me with impatience. "What is it girl!?" "Fuck we need to break up." He stares at me briefly and bursts into laughter. "You ain't going nowhere, fuck that, you damn there was about to have my kid, and I was okay with that. Now you just gonna up and leave?" "Dammit Abel, all we do is do drugs and fuck. Do you really think you're capable and ready to be a father? Or even be my man, when you go back on tour you just gonna have your groupies ready to go and lined up." Abel starts to shake his while laughing in this evil demeanor. "Why are you being a bitch. After everything I done for you?" I couldn't believe he called me out of my name. Tears start to pile in my water line. "I don't even go to college anymore, and you got me addicted to coke and molly. You fucking ruined me....." As I was sobbing I ignored all the faces and gestures he was making. "Take me home!" I demanded.. He started the car and drove in grave silence.