Breathe

9

I must've fallen asleep

because when I woke up

I was still at the beach.

It also

must've been 

really early in the morning

because the sun was still

under the horizon

and there was nobody 

on the beach.

It took me a minute

to get the strength

to push myself off the sand,

to move at all.

It took everything in me

to just walk,

because I felt so weak

so 

empty

and it was then

that I realized 

I hadn't eaten anything

since dinner with my parents

which was two days ago..

how could I forget to eat?

sure,

I drank

but food?

how could I forget?

I just

my head hurt so bad

thanks to the alcohol

that I drank the night before,

not that I was even drunk.

I felt so weak

so

weak....

I found myself

stumbling

towards the cafe

that was open 24/7.

I collapsed into a booth

as soon as I was inside

because it was as if

I couldn't even walk anymore

I couldn't stand

I couldn't 

do

anything.

I closed my eyes

and put my head on the table

and started crying

even if the people working saw me

even if the two other people

sitting in the cafe

could see me fall apart

I just couldn't take it anymore

I didn't even know

what it was.

Life?

I couldn't even describe it

all I knew

was that I couldn't keep going

I was alone