Muslim Girls in Love

Chapter 27: The Funeral

Tesneem's POV

It was the morning after Amany's death. I wanted to get ejected out of the hospital so I could attend the funeral, but I was way too scared to go out with the twins.

Zaeem walked over to my bed and stroked my cheek.

"Shhh, it's okay. Everything will be okay..."

I didn't even realize that I was crying. I miss Amany so much. And I'm too afraid to be on my own with these kids. I'm not ready!

"I'm fine, I'm just in a little pain. You know, physically. And mentally. And emotionally. I'm so tired, Zaeem. Can we leave the kids here? I don't know if I can do this so soon. I need time to recover!"

He chuckled at me as he replied," don't worry. Just a little over 18 years left of this. As soon as we find them wives, we can stop taking care of them"

I guess he was right...

"Whatever, I just want to get out of here!" I sad, knocking my head against the headboard.

As if on command, my nurse came in and checked on me and the kids.

"Well, everything seems to be okay. If you're feeling strong, we can release you now! How does that sound?" Dr. Paige said.

"Incredible! Let's go. Now" I said, getting up and reaching to get my hospital bag.

"Let me help you with that" my dazzling husband said, as he grabbed my hand and kissed it.

Oh God.

He made me feel beautiful even with my bloated, saggy skinned, lifeless shark eyes and pale skinned body. It almost embarrassed me because he looked so good with his beautiful five o'clock shadow and his blue fitted muscle tee and running shorts.

I let him grab my bag and take it to the bathroom for me. I got dressed and came out, only to find him sitting with Adam and rocking him gently. I just about melted at the very sight.

Alas, it was time to go. We grabbed all of our things, and Zaeem went to go bring his car to the front of the hospital. The nurses inspected it to make sure the babies had a decent riding space with safe car seats, which they did. My maternal instincts made sure of it.

We all got into the car, and I decided to sit in the back, next to my two beautiful sons. Usually, Zaeem and I would talk in the car, or play some sort of game. But today was different. We were both thinking the same thing. We are growing. We were parents now. We're parents and our friend just passed away because of us. I know Zaeem was helping me more than usual today because he pitied me.

And to be honest, I pity myself. I have no time to heal, I'm raising two kids, and my best friend just passed away. I feel as if I'm a prisoner in my mind, an unfortunate survivor of my deadly train of thoughts. I'm crying in the back seat of my car, and I'm too afraid to make any sound as to not wake up the boys, and not to attract attention from Zaeem.

Zaeem broke the silence.

"How are you feeling? Does anything hurt? What's wrong?"

I couldn't even respond to him. I had no real answer. I'm feeling excited, depressed, tired and shocked. My head hurts, my stomach hurts and my heart hurts. Everything fees so wrong. But I couldn't tell him that.

"Nothing's wrong. I'm okay" I replied, looking down to hide my face.

At this point, we finally made it to our destination. The funeral was held at my favorite masjid, the same one my Nikkah was written at.

It was called Masjid Omar. It had beautiful old architecture with a modern and slick interior. The high ceilings were beautifully painted and the walls were adorned with Arabic calligraphy.

I associated this masjid with a good time. It was where I prayed every Friday, and every night in Ramadan. But I'll never be able to see this beautiful masjid the same way now.

We entered the masjid with the two car seats. I agreed to take Adam and Zaeem took Dean. We listened to a khutba, prayed, made duaa, and read Quran until no more tears could run down my cheeks.

Although I rarely saw Amany, I genuinely missed her.

I saw Maysara, Tesneem and the female relatives of our entire community. It was so nice to see everybody, and they were all surprised that I had just given birth and hadn't even gone home yet. But what can I say, my deceased best friend is my priority.

Everyone took turns picking up Adam and carrying him, cooing him and playing with him until I saw Zaeem peeking into the women's side of the masjid. We made eye contact and he immediately gave me the "come over here!" sign with his hands.

As expected, Dean was crying and wanted to be fed. Zaeem still didn't know how to deal, and of course I had to feed him. This is the sign that we had to leave.

I said Salam to everyone and we finally left, for the first time, to our new home.

Maysara's POV

I woke up in denial. I didn't want to believe that I was about to get ready for my best friend's funeral. I know that everyone has their time, but it never occurred to me that it would be this soon.

I got up and got dressed. I wore an abaya that Amany got me as a marriage gift, partly because it's the only thing that covered my gross, loose pregnancy skin, and partly in honor of Amany. Although, I didn't really want to think about being married...

I went downstairs and saw that my mom was also dressed ready to go. To my surprise, Yessin was also here with the beautiful Amira! We were all planning on going together.

When we got to Masjid Omar, I was also surprised to see Tesneem and Adam! While Tesneem was praying, Adam started to whine a little. So, I took him out of his car seat and began to coo him until he fell asleep.

To be honest, at this point I was completely jealous of Tes. I just lost my baby and my best friend, and here she was bragging with not one, but two babies.

I dismissed the thought and tried to continue reading Quran and making duaa, but for some reason, the thought of taking Adam home with me couldn't escape my mind. So I figured I'd take my chances and ask Tesneem if I could take Adam with me and look after him until he gets old enough for her to be able to take care of him.

I knew that having twins, especially as new born babies, can be extremely difficult and tiring, and even though I know Tesneem could probably deal with two babies at once, I wanted to help her, and fill the missing void of having a baby in my life.

Maybe God knew my intentions weren't exactly pure, because Tesneem got up, said Salam and walked out hurriedly to Zaeem, who was holding Dean.

I guess I'll just ask her next time...

Author's Note
Hi ladies! I just got back from a month and a half long vacation, and my vacation place did not have sufficient wifi for me to write and publish. I tried on multiple occasions, but noting would save. I'm sorry for this very late chapter, but I hope you enjoy. I'll try and publish the next chapter wishing the next two or three days! Thank you for your immaculate amount of patience!