Enduring the Stars

Chapter 4

Saying goodbye to Zander was much harder than I thought it would have been, I mean by the time we were saying our farewells we had only known each other for what? 10 to 14 hours. It’s crazy to think I was actually blinking away tears to the thought of never seeing him again.

We shared phone numbers and he promised me that if we were meant to know each other then we would meet up somehow. I just hoped he was right, that we would someday meet up but hey, if we don’t ill just be one step backwards from actually being happy again. Zander being the gentlemen he was carried most of my bags to the taxi Mr. and Mrs. Rainwalter had organized for me. Apparently she was busy at a party for the kids or something, her husband was a work and well I assume none else was old enough to drive. And to be honest I’d rather skip the whole awkward car journey to Sandpoint.

When my Taxi arrived neither one of us moved, we just stood there looking at each other hungrily snatching all the moments we could. It was the driver that broke our trance. “Hey! We gotta’ two and a half our drive ahead of me and I wanna make it back before dark so comon’ or get lost!” I sharply swung my head around, grimacing as my mussels protested. I took in the driver’s appearance, he was what? About 45 early 50’s, grey haired almost bald, a fat beer belly and from what I could see had empty Mickey D’s boxes in the front of his car. That’s just fab! By the time I get to the house I’ll smell of chemical burgers and fries, just great! I had a sudden urge to set alight to them but quickly thought against it; after all I wouldn’t have a ride would I?

Now turning my attention back to Zander I noticed that he had already put my entire luggage in the car and was back at my side and before I even knew it I was included in a massive bear hug. Now I tell you, to anyone else this might have look sweet maybe even cute but being in my shoes well to put it basically.

I couldn’t breathe.

I flailed my arms trying to get out of the embrace but nothing changed. Feeling my face heat up due to the lack of oxygen I was getting, I tried a different approach. I lightly kicked his shin. He quickly leapt back and cuddled his right leg that I attacked. “What was that for!?” Smiling innocently I blinked four times. “I have no idea what your talking about”

Giving me a mock glare, he walked me to the side of the car opening the door. “See you soon Rissa” I cocked up both my eyebrows as I couldn’t do the awesome thing with one in question of the nickname he had given me. “What? I want to be different. I bet no one else has called you that have they?” Only shaking my head as a reply I slowly climbed into the car. Once my butt was firmly planted on the seat he shut the door, taking one step back. As much as I didn’t want this to be goodbye I was kinda excited to find out where I would be living for the next two years. I heard the unnerving rumble from the car start, since when did I have a fear of car rides? Oh yeah Narissa since your family died in one.  

Ignoring the unsettling feeling that had started in my stomach I looked out the window to Zander. He was standing about two giant steps away from the car, looking back at me. And for a minute there I got lost in his muddy eyes as he stared back at mine.

Just as the car began forwards gave him a slight nod and smile, waving through the glass window so he could see. In return he gave me a dazzling smile and nod before mouthing something to me. I couldn’t figure out what he said but before I knew it my dreams were filled with the colour green.

It’s funny—when people call you “shy,” they usually smile. Like it’s cute, some funny little habit you’ll grow out of when you’re older, like the gaps in your grin when your baby teeth fall out. If they knew how it felt—really being shy, not just unsure at first—they wouldn’t smile. Not if they knew how the feeling knots up your stomach or makes your palms sweat or robs you of the ability to say anything that makes sense. It’s not cute at all. My parents never smiled when they said it. They were smarter than that, and I always felt like they understood, until they decided that age sixteen was the right time for me to get past it somehow.