destructive // l. hemmings

chapter fourteen

I could feel myself crumble up inside as I woke up several hours before Luke, the sound of Rickeie talking to people rang in the inner portion of my ear. I had fully awoken at this point and I could see the surroundings before me; the same four walls and the same old fabrics of furniture. I turned my head to look at Luke, who was still sound asleep -- pieces of hair clinging to his face while his mouth opened slightly. I could remember all the details of times when it was quiet and simple between us yet the thought completely deteriorated as the objective before me was presented.

"You had your fun, now stop fucking around. Check his jeans and find his key quickly so we can proceed with the final step to this charade," Rickie informed me as I began to scan the room for his jeans. I found them in a pile next to his shirt. Getting up slowly from the bed, I could feel Luke tossing over as I moved. I bit down on my bottom lip, hoping that there wasn't a chance that he'd wake up from that. As another second passed, it didn't seem like he was going to, so I walked over, grabbing the denim and searching inside the pockets, feeling nothing.

"Go upstairs and search, we need that key in order to gain access to the house."

I wanted to ask him a thousand and one questions but decided to keep my mouth shut, knowing I wouldn't like the answers I'd receive. I looked back over at Luke, mouthing the words, "I'm sorry," as I stepped out of the room, walking on the balls of my feet down towards the stairway, stepping up onto each board until I was at the top. I turned the knob slowly and looked around at my surroundings before walking forward, seeing nothing but an empty room. I walked on my toes again, trying my hardest not to make noise. I moved my way through the kitchen, seeing a pair of keys laying on the table. I grabbed hold of them carefully and stuffed them in my pocket.

"Now listen closely to what I want you to do, you got it?"

I nodded my head, looking over at the camera that was set up at the top of the cabinet.

"You aren't going to tell them where you are going, you are just going to simply walk out the door, my men are going to be parked at the end of the road, you are to meet them. They will make a copy of the keys and you'll return home. As you are walking, two guns are going to be aimed at you, ready to fire if you try anything funny, so I suggest you get a move on,"

I listened to his words, wanting to refuse, but knowing the consequences.

I held my breath as they pushed my head under the water for the fifth time, my lungs feeling as though they were collapsing in on themselves. Rickie grabbed hold of my throat and pulled my face towards him harshly.

"I should really have killed you when I had the fucking chance, but I'd rather make you my pet. How do you think Luke will feel when he finds out the love of his life sent them all to their deaths? Guess you're going to find out soon enough when I make you watch as I bash their skulls in," and with that he pushed my head back into the water, forcefully, giving me only seconds of breathing time before doing it all over again.

The scenario played out in my head more times than I'd like to admit. It felt like I was stuck in a time loop and there was no way I could escape the gut-wrenching feeling. I touched the skin of my stomach, remembering every little thing he did to hurt me -- the knife sliding into my intestines, twisting around before being yanked out from the flesh. I wanted to make him feel the same pain as I did and I knew it wouldn't be easy because every move I made was being watched.

•••

I couldn't stop shaking my leg as I watched Luke approach me. I knew exactly how this was going to end, and I wanted him to know that I was sorry. I knew that I also needed to keep my mouth shut or my lips would be sealed permanently. Rickie was ever a person to shy away from pain and I was fully aware of what he was capable of. I don't wish it on any person, but that was the consequence of being disloyal to the drug lord himself. He was one of the most powerful men in the state of California and I was sure that there was no machine or authority that could stand in his way.

•••

"Y/N, are you okay?" Rebecca jokingly asked for I knew she didn't give two shits about me.

"I'm alright, but how are you? Did you enjoy fucking my boyfriend for the past few months?" I snapped, earning a response that I wanted.

"I don't know who you think you are, but you can't change anything. I will continue to fuck my boyfriend until the day he's done with me. You were never anything special, sweets."

I grabbed hold of her head, smashing her face against the table, watching the blood flow from her nose as she gasped for air. She touched her nose and noticed the liquid, and fell to the ground.

I shook off the idea before replying, "Whatever you say, I was his first everything, you were second best."

I walked into the bathroom, remembering that there was a wad of cash hidden inside the bottom of the sink. I opened the cabinets and reached up to the top and sure enough, taped up in the corner was the money. I stood up, quickly turning around and bumping into Luke.

"I'm sorry, I didn't see you there..." He says, yawning loudly before giving me a quick kiss. I returned the action and walked around him. I had felt the anxiety wash over me the further I walked away

"No round two in the shower?" He asked, pulling off his shirt. I shook my head frantically and told him I needed to take a walk outside. He was too tired to reply so he simply said "stay close by." I nodded my head and walked away towards the door to the front. I took a deep breath, covered myself with a hood, and proceeded to walk outside.

As the cooled air hit my skin, I couldn't help but let out a harp breath. I made my way to the side of the building and rested my head against the brick. As I closed my eyes, I just envisioned the scenario of me giving myself up.

I grabbed hold of the earpiece that laid in my eye and I threw it onto the ground, Stomping feverously, I made sure to destroy the thing completely. "Come get me, I'm through. Do your fucking worst.." As the words left my mouth, I could feel pain throbbing through my chest. My eyes trail down to the sight of blood spreading along with my shirt at a rapid pace. I fall to the ground with a loud thud, my skull hitting the hard pavement below me...

I shake off the thought, letting out a loud scream. A noise following that was so profound that even I couldn't identify it. I moved my body from the wall and looked down at my now trembling fists. I wanted to feel emotion, I didn't want this rage that was taking over my body. I sucked in a sharp breath and introduced the wall to my fist. As my skin made contact, I could feel the pain shoot through my arm. I continued punching the wall until I felt an excess amount of blood leave my knuckles. I let out another yelp as I fell to the ground.

"What a shitty little display of anger we have here, huh? I could hear Rickey's voice ring through my ear. I wanted to pull out the earpiece as soon as I heard his smug fucking voice.

"What happens now?" I ask, wanting nothing more than this to be over with.

"You'll just have to wait and see.."

___________

So, here's the deal. I wrote this several years ago so I don't have any idea on what I wanted to finish this with.

I mean, maybe this is the end...a cliffhanger into another one? IDK.

Regardless, thanks for reading this shitshow!

- c