Save me

Part 5

They were cuddling on the couch with Lisbon snuggled in his arms and her head on his chest. Jane ran his hands on her back slowly as they enjoyed together a movie. During the movie Jane cupped her face and captured her mouth with his. Lisbon responded immediately moving her arms around his neck. They both moaned when they deepen the kiss and Lisbon broke the kiss a few moments later moving against him. And with it Jane knew one thing... they would not make it to bed.

The next day Lisbon woke up by soft strokes on her cheeks and from the smell of fresh pancakes.

"What do you want?" she growled with her eyes closed.

"Your breakfast is ready my princess. Come on wake up and enjoy it." Jane replied as he traced kisses on her neck.

Lisbon smiled and leant in to kiss him tenderly.

"I love you." she whispered against his lips opening her eyes and Jane smiled. "What are you smiling about?"

"Nothing. I was just thinking how lucky I am. I love you too Lisbon." Jane said and caught her hand and brought it to his lips.

"Lisbon, I have an idea..." Jane began softly

"What? Come on Jane. Tell me." Lisbon said impatiently.

"What would you say about leaving for a little while? " Jane asked lightly.

"Just the two of us?" Lisbon asked back with a curious expression. "Where do you think about?"

"Mexico. I would like to show you my island. I dreamt you were with me there many times." Jane replied trying to avoid the bad and lonely memories.

"I would like it. I tried to picture the place from your letters. It seemed beautiful and peaceful like a paradise." Lisbon responded with a smile.

"I wouldn't change my place here with you for any paradise." Jane said with a emotional voice.

"You better not."Lisbon mocked him and pecked him on his lips.

"Then it's settle. I will start the preparations." Jane said with a smirk. "Now, sit back to the pillows. Your breakfast will be cold ."

A few days later:

Jane carried the suitcases from the airport holding her hand all the time. He showed her his island, the ocean, his old room, he introduced her to Alfredo, to the ladies from the post office , in a few words to everyone. The mornings they ate to Alfredo's little place watching the ocean and the birds. Later they took long walks on the beach where Jane kissed her over and over again as he had dreamt the two long years he had lived there alone. They bathed on the warm ocean every afternoon exchanging wet kisses as they savored each other's mouth. One day Jane had written their names on the sand in a heart which Lisbon found it ridiculously cute and sweet.

They were so happy. Lisbon loved the island as much as he and away from everything she allowed herself to relax and have a nice time. Lisbon liked to sit beside the ocean and watch the blue sky.

"It's so beautiful isn't it?." she whispered looking at the blue ocean.

"Can't argue on it." Jane responded looking at her and Lisbon blushed smiling.

"Jane..."

"Not my fault my woman is the fairest of fall!" he replied seriously and Lisbon chuckled as she leaned for a kiss.

When they broke she looked up at Jane's eyes which they were shining with love and affection.

The nights they ended in their room for passionate demonstration of their love.

Sometimes Jane woke up screaming from a nightmare.

"I am sorry Jane." Lisbon said looking at his eyes

"Don't..." Jane tried "Please, Lisbon"

"But I don't love you" Lisbon said coldly and tear escaped from Jane's eyes.

"Please Lisbon." Jane begged

"what Jane?"

"Please don't leave me. I love you." Jane said tearful.

"I don't care anymore. I don't love you. You deserve to be alone Jane. " she said and took her suitcase. "Goodbye Jane."

"Nooooo...." Jane screamed waking up with a terrified Lisbon on his side. Her heart broke painfully seeing him afraid and wrapped her arms around him.

The last night on the island Lisbon was sad, she had loved it. Jane promised her they could come back anytime she want it.

Now they were back in Austin on Lisbon's house. It had passed two weeks since their return and everything was back in normal. Lisbon returned to work but in desk duty and Jane chose to work at the most important cases.

One night Lisbon woke up and Jane wasn't on the bed. She got up and tiptoed on the house, searching for him.

Lisbon found him on the kitchen sitting with a cup of tea in front of him on the table. She didn't draw his attention and she stayed on the dark watching him.

Jane was playing with his wedding ring and Lisbon could see tears on his eyes. She didn't realized her own tears and she climbed the stairs and entered her room again. A half hour later Jane was there and he laid beside her taking her carefully on his arms. Lisbon didn't say anything and left him just held her.

Lisbon woke up early the next day. Jane was still asleep and she took some minutes to look at him because it would be the last moment she would share with him and her heart broke painfully on her chest. Because while she wasn't able to, he was making her the happier she had ever been. But he would never be her completely as much painful it was.

Lisbon disconnected herself carefully without waking him up. After she made a small bag and wrote a letter , she left the house giving a last look at Jane.

When Jane woke up he found the bed empty. Jane frowned as he didn't hear any sounds on the house. He got up and began to look for Lisbon. He screamed her name but without any response. When he entered the kitchen he found a letter on the table and his heart was breaking in his chest.

Dear Jane,

I know you are confused right now but I want you to know I didn't let you. Because I can't. I woke up last night and I saw you in the kitchen playing with your wedding ring. I know you will always love your family and I respect it but I can't be their replacements. I refuse to be the second choice. Last night, I confirmed something that I refused to believe... I don't want you to stay with me from pity or obligation to the baby. I don't want to see you feel guilty about us to your family. I love you so much and I will not bear you to hate me one day because of it. I promise you to take care of myself and the baby. I won't let myself fall into a depression again. Please don't look after me. Just give me some time my love. I need some time alone to think. You need it too. I don't know when I will come back but I will one day. I don't want to keep you out of your child's life. It all happened so sudden and we need time to catch up . This is a temporary goodbye and it is the hardest thing I have ever done.

Goodbye my love. Thanks for taking care of me when I couldn't.

I will always love you,

Your Lisbon.

nqI