The Princess Bride

Chapter Fourty-five: Green Speckled Recluse

In the first place, the door they opened had no lock, so it could not trap them. And in the second place the stairs were all brightly lit.  And in the third place the stairs were absolutely straight.  And in the the fourth place, it wasn't a long fight at all.

And In the main place, there was nothing inside.  It was bright and clean and totally, without the least doubt, empty. 

"I don't believe it for a minute," Aster said, and, holding his sword at the ready, he took the first step down. "Stay by the door-the candles will go out any second."

He took a second step.

The candles stayed bright.

A third step. The fourth.  There were only about a dozen steps in all, and he took two more, stopping in the middle. Each step was perhaps a foot in width, so he was six feet from North, six feet from the large, ornate green-handled door that opened onto the final level. "North?"

From the upper door: "What?"

"I'm frightened."

"It looks all right though."

"No.  It's supposed to; that's to fool us.  Whatever we've gotten by before, this must be the worst."

"But there'r nothing to see, Aster."

Aster nodded. "That's why I'm so frightened." He took another T step down toward the final, ornate green-handled door. Another.  Four steps to go.  Four feet to go.

Fouty-eight inches from death.

Aster took another step. He was trembling now; almost out of control.

"Why are you shaking?" North from the top.

"Death is here.  Death is here." He took another step down. Twenty-four in chest to dying.

"Can I come and join you now?"

Aster shook his head.  "No point in you dying too."

"But it's empty."

"No. Death is here." Now he was out of control. "If I could see it, I could fight it."

North didn't know what to do.

"I'm Aster Bunmand the Wizard; come for me!"  He turned around and around, sword ready, studying the bright lit staircase.

"Now your scaring me," North said, and he let the door close behind him and started down the stairs.

Aster started up after him, saying "No." They met on the sixth step.

Seventy-two inches from death now. 

The green speckled recluse doesn't destroy as quickly as the stonefish.  And many think the mamba brings more suffering, what with the ulcerating and all. But gram for gram, nothing in the universe comes close to the green specked recluse; among other spiders, compared with the green specked recluse, the black widow was a rag doll. Prince Hans's recluse lived behind the ornate green handle on the bottom door. She rarely moved, unless the handle turned. Then she struck like lightning.

On the sixth stair, North put his arm around Aster's shoulder.  "We'll go down together, step by step.  There's nothing here, Aster."

To the fifth step. "There has to be."

"Why?"

"Because the Prince is a fiend. And Black is his twin in misery. And this is their master piece." They moved to the fourth step.

"That's wonderful thinking, Aster," North said, loud and calmly; but, inside, he was starting to go to pieces.  Because here he was, in this nice bright place, and his own friend in all the world was cracking from the strain.  And if you were North, and you hadn't much brain power, and you found yourself four stories underground in a Zoo of Death looking for a ma in black they you really didn't think was down there, and the only friend you had in all the world was going quickly mad, what did you do?

Three steps now.

If you were North, you panicked, because if Aster went mad, that meant the leader of the whole expedition was you, and if you were North, you knew the last think in the world you could ever be was a leader. So North did what he always did in a panic situation. 

He bolted.

He just yelled and jumped for the door and slammed it open with his body, never ever bothering with the niceties of turning the pretty green handle, and as the door gave behind his strength he kept right running until he came to the giant cage and there, inside and still, lay the man in black.  North stopped then, relived greatly, because seeing that silent body meant one thing: Aster was right, and if Aster was right, he couldn't be crazy, and if he wasn't crazy, then North didn't have to lead anybody anywhere. And when that thought reached his brain, North smiled.

Aster, for his part, was startled at North's strange behaviour.  He saw no reason for it whatsoever, and was about to call after North when he saw a tiny green specked spider scurrying down from the door handle, so he stepped on it with his boot as he hurried to the cage.

North was already inside the place, kneeling over the body. 

"Don't say it," Aster said, entering.

North tried not to but it was on his face. "Dead." 

Aster examined the body.  He had seen a lot of corpses in his time. "Dead." Then he sat down miserably on the floor and put his arms around his knees and rocked back and fourth like a baby, back and fourth, back and fourth and back.

I was too unfair. You expected unfairness if you breathed, but this went beyond thta.  He, Aster, no thinker, had thought-hand't he found the man in black? He, Aster, frightened of beasts and crawlers and anything that stung, had brought them down to the Zoo unharmed. He had said goodby to caution and stretched himself far beyond any boundaries he ever dreamed he possessed.  An now, after such effort, after being reunited with North on this day of days for this one purpose, to find the man to help him find a plan to help him revenge his beloved dead wife.  All was gone. Hope? Gone. Future? Gone. All the driving forces of his life.  Gone. Snuffed out. Beaten. Dead. 

"I am Aster Bunmand, the song of Domingo Bunmand, and I do not accept it." He sprang to his feet, started up the underground stairs, stopping only long enough to snap commands. "Come, come along.  Bring the body." He searched through his pockets for a moment, but they were empty, from the brandy. "Have you got any money, North??"

"Some. they pay well at the Brute Squad."

"Well I just hope it's enough to buy a miracle, that's all."