Bleeding Hearts

twelve

for aurora once again, because her endless support is heartwarming and the cover she made me is so gorgeous <3333

TWELVE

"Hey."

"Hey," I smile softly, feeling a blush travel up my cheeks as Brady smiles warmly at me.

"Um," Brady looks around for a second before leaning down close to my ear, so close that his breath tickles my neck. "We need to talk."

I resist the urge to shiver, instead pursing my lips and nodding my head in agreement. I've been thinking a lot lately about Brady and I—honestly just a day—and I still have no clue what to do. The pros and cons are weighed evenly, even after mulling it over with Kendra for a few hours last night, and nothing seems to stick out to me as a reason to not intensify things with Brady or a reason to intensify things. My heart is stuck between a rock and a hard place, and my brain is just numb.

It's lunch time right now, so I know that we can honestly find anywhere to talk but there's one place that comes to mind. "How about the auditorium?" I suggest.

Brady nods and begins to follow me down through the school and towards the one room that feels so much like home to me. I know that here I can be completely honest and vulnerable to Brady, which is exactly what he needs from me after such a kiss. I've also been avoiding him all day—I came extremely early to school to get all of my things and then went straight to class to avoid locker confrontation, power walked through the hallways so that he wouldn't be able to catch me, and in the one class that we shared I excused myself to the bathroom so that I wouldn't have to talk to him for an entire period. Pathetic, I know.

When we reach the auditorium, Brady and I sit on the very edge of the stage so that our feet swing. Brady inhales and exhales, showing the defined bone structure of his face, before speaking with honesty and vulnerability. "I like you, Leah. I really like you."

"I kinda got that." I mutter, beginning to play with the end of my fishtail braid that's down the front of my left shoulder.

"Yeah," He chuckles. "Well I've liked you for a while now, maybe since like the 5th grade. I've wanted to tell you for so long but just when I got the guts, you started liking Ford, a lot, and I didn't want to make things complicated for you so I just kind of kept it to myself. I didn't even really tell Landon until around freshman year, and I never told Kendra because I knew she'd just tell you and that would kind of ruin everything."

"Yeah." I laugh lightly, remembering how horrible Kendra was (and still is) at keeping secrets.

"Anyway though, when you and Ford started dating I just kind of took that as a hint to back off. I still liked you and all but I knew how happy Ford made you and how happy you made Ford so I just took one for the team and learned to deal with myself. I dated girls here and there to get over you but it was never really all that satisfying for me, so that's why they never really lasted." Brady runs a hand through his wavy hair then, sighing through the process. "And then when you and Ford broke up, I knew it definitely wasn't the time. I mean you were completely heartbroken, and how horrible of a time to tell you how I felt? It wasn't my turn with you, and I knew that, so I just focused on making you feel better. Then you got the hair and the confidence and just everything that makes you Leah back and I just couldn't control my emotions around you. I was falling hard for you, Leah, and I know this sounds crazy but I've thought about kissing you so many times that I've lost count.