"I am an Asshole."
"Love is always worth fighting for."
Derek walked out of the Hamilton's stridently towards the deserted street in search of some moments of peace and quiet to get his head and heart settled.
He wanted to shout loud so that all the anguish brimming in his heart could come out.
He looked up at the dark sky devoid of any star and searched for the thing he always searched for, hope. His mother. Her words. Anything that could in the moment, fit into the moment of despair that he brought upon himself. He knew that he should be happy because the fog of misunderstanding between him and Iris was cleared out but what he did, what he said was something that made a part him totally perplexed, scared and afraid. A part that is shouting that he lost her again.
He gritted his teeth in frustration and hit the first thing, his leg got contacted with, which BTW, was a car parked at the side of the street, as the jolt of pain hit him, his body stumbled back and he winced.
"Hell..." He muttered as the sirens blared from the car. But was instantly dragged in the alley at the end of the street by Dean who followed him out of the hotel.
"Are you out of your mind?" Dean half-yelled and dragged Derek back into the alley, next to where the car was parked.
Derek glared at Dean, heaving.
"Don't answer." Dean said as he raised his hand in protest and saw a boiling Derek which he last saw when Sarah betrayed him and he was so naïve to have seen it coming.
"I am an asshole..." Derek murmured and walk away from Dean's grasp and stood with support of the wall under the street lamp and bowed his head.
"Okaaaay." Dean said and looked keenly at Derek who was looking at the gravel.
Derek looked back at his reflection from the pit of water on the gravel. He looked at the person staring back at him, and found the different person he ought himself to be. After all the things that had happened in his life, all the lessons he learned, now they seem all in vain. The life he wanted turned into the life he had never expected it to be.
He always knew and heard from his Dad, that life is a battle between the two worlds, one that your mind has chosen, the realistic one and the other your heart, the fantasizing one. But his Mother taught him the real truth that has been omitted by his workaholic father that life actually is a balance of both.
He looked up and found Dean staring back at him. He sighed and rubbed his face with his hand.
"I don't know, Dean." Derek said as he slumped his shoulders.
"I tried to maintain the balance but I failed, I freaking failed. I lost it all to the heart. I thought to keep it balanced but I just couldn't. Everything about her is a puzzle, a universe yet to be delved, something enticing, and Dean I want it all, every freaking part of her, the universe, her soul. But...everything seems wrong, if I do something I regret if I don't, still I regret. I just don't want to hurt her." Derek put his palms on his face and exhaled.
"I told her that I love her. I wanted to assure her and myself of all the strange and uncanny feelings that had invaded my heart, I gave them a name. But then now I thought of that, all I could think of her, what if I had hurt her?!"
Derek sighed and looked at Dean expectantly.
"So it's been said love doesn't make sense." Dean smiled and shook his head.
Derek looked at Dean who was smiling at him and pulled his brows together in perplexity.
"No. You didn't hurt her. All the shit about love that it hurts is the myth for those who never learned the true meaning of it. Love gives you peace, not the storms. She is in the state of denial and you in a reconciliation, both of you are still away from love but when you both will get there you will know, Derek. And in between, all the good shit will happen. And you have to take it all, keep calm and rejoice it." Dean said smiling.
Dean walked towards him and put his hand on his shoulder.
"What now?"
Derek sighed and looked down
"I almost kissed her." He said sheepishly.
Dean's eyes widened and he fell back and put his hand on his mouth.
Derek looked up and found Dean in fits of laughter.
"You did not..." Dean managed to say out as he tried to control his laughter.
"What I told you, the moment. I was driven." Derek said defending himself.
"Moment with Iris? Did she slap you? Or hit you in your balls? Something more inappropriate that you find it demeaning to share with me." Dean asked grinning and wiggles his brows.
Derek gave Dean a disgusted look and arched his brow.
"She didn't push me. It's just-"
"She didn't push you?"
Derek looked at Dean and Dean looked back with the same thought running in both of their minds.
"She didn't push me." Derek said as a matter of fact.
"That means you are not an asshole." Dean pointed out and hit Derek's shoulder lightly.
Derek chuckled lightly and Dean joined him.
"Derek, I know things are confusing between you two, but I admire the way you have come this far, the guy you were and the guy you have become is someone what astounded me briefly. I saw you deep sunk in misery. I saw happiness in those eyes when there was time I only saw pain. Dude, I saw hope, love. And I want you to cherish it. I seriously hate that old Derek, who was afraid of getting out of the line, the disciplined one, though you still are a saint type guy but with a little modification, that I actually am enjoying."
He said as he patted Derek's shoulder.
"With modification..." Derek stated and laughed and Dean joined him.
"Go for what you want, fight for it, Derek."
Derek nodded and looked at the sky and saw a star shinning right upon him.
He smiled and thought,
'Nothing regarding to her seems to make sense, what I have been doing from past months is something I thought I would never do for anyone. But then after meeting you Iris Hadraniel and getting to know you slowly and gradually, one thing that comes out in the open bright and clear is that you are just not anybody. And I would do anything to make this very same thing to be shown to you, that you are special and you deserve to smile. I am coming for you, I won't let you run, ever again.'
★♥★
Hey.. Peeps. ♥
You guys have been missed. ♥
I am back without a bang.. I know this chapter is short but I promise I will update the next chapter soon.
And about my exams they went bizarre but I will pass.
But I missed wattpad a lot and you guys, my awesome readers. But I am back :D Now I will update as fast as I could ♥ Pinky promise :D
And and but my engine need fuel to work which btw is love and appreciation of you guys. So please comment and please press that star sign at the end of this chapter. Pretty please. :D
Spread love and joy.
Loads of love,
_autumngirl_.
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||Say yes...please?|| {Unedited}
Romance"Will you go on a date with me?" He asked "NO" that was all she said "Will you go on a date with me?" He asked again "NO" she said rolling her eyes "Will you go on a date with me?" he asked yet again "No despo" she stated without showing any emotion...
