Random Poems

Intoxicated Mask

One night to release the pain of continuous mundane tasks,

One perfect chance to put on that intoxicated mask.

Each tip of the glass, and another one full,

Warming the chill and rejecting the cool.

One after another until memories are forgotten, 

Bubbling outside, but inside I'm rotten.

Spiralling down... I'm out of control

Nothing makes sense, I'm no longer tense, 

And suddenly something soft sighs into my mouth.

A foreign feature to me but not to him,

Walls are breaking, grip on conscience is slim.

The night goes further and I'm still unaware,

Not yet hiding what I don't want to share.

Hands on my chest and breathing is hitched,

Proceeding further, the hour bewitched. 

The sensation is dull or I could care not,

 Lips to my neck, his breathing is hot.

Dirty words are spilt from his lips,

Having more effect than his skilled fingers.

Soaking on his fingertips,

Yet the boredom still lingers.

"Stop," I pant.

Maybe its the intoxication or the slight warmth stirring in my lower abdomen that makes my breathless refusal to participate seem unconvincing. 

Nevertheless, the boy continues,

He continues what he shan't. 

The toxic smell of hard liquor reminds me to be forgiving.

What does this make me to allow this? A slut? A whore?

A lady as inexperienced as I on a careless fling with a not-so-handsome stranger. 

Kinda reminds me of "Virgin" Mary giving birth in a manger. 

Was the pregnancy her fault?

Was she present in her intercourse?

Or did her memories flee on her trip to the angels

Making her forget the first time? 

If one does not remember their initial,

Can they qualify as a virgin?

What if there is no such thing as "virgin"?

A social construct that creates a margin between "pure" and "impure".

A bullshit measurement, I am sure. 

I cannot continue, surely I can't. 

My conscious is fuzzy and nothing's the same... Nothing makes sense.

Patterns are gone and the rhythm is torn.

Now that I'm thinking, am I reborn?

I don't want him in me, my tenses are mixed,

I can be stronger, this night can be fixed. 

Sex on my mind but not with a boy.

When did I turn into some mindless toy?

Dizziness stirs but I have my will.

One night for experiences,

One perfect chance to kill.