Your Blood Is My Sorrow (WORK IN PROGRESS)

Your Blood Is My Sorrow

1

 The very first thing I thought was it can’t be right. There must be a mistake. There is no way this happened. But it did and there is nothing I can do to re wind the day it happened and change it.  But if I could, I would have done a lot of things differently. But first I need to tell you the whole story. Starting with the night I heard that my parents were going to be divorced.  I was sitting in my room, making plans with my best friend Tyler. "So, last day of school tomorrow. You sure you want to go?" Tyler asked. "Ty, I have to go... we both know how my mom is." I tightened the phone to my ear hoping that my mom hadn't picked the phone up to see who I was talking about. Sure enough, I heard a click from her hanging up. "My mom heard our conversation." I said sighing. " Not the first time!" Tyler laughed.

 "Carlie!"

 "Speaking of the devil.... Yes mom?" I basically had to yell. The house was huge perks of your father being  a record producer. "Dinner in 5." She yelled back. "I have to go. Dinner time. The one part of the day that I look forward to!" I said faking a high pitch voice. "Alright whatever. Since you have to go to school then I'll go. I'll see you there." She hung up before I could say anything. I put the phone back on the receiver and walked to the kitchen. When I walked in everything seemed fine. Except for the fact that my mother was talking to my father in hushed tones. I couldn't catch all of what they were saying, but I knew that it was an argument. Maybe they wanted to send me back into foster care. They didn't like me that much anyway.

"Sit, we are eating lasagna." My mom said not turning her head towards me. I walked to the table and sat down. Maddie and Eric must have already set the table, usually they ask me to do it. But Maddie and Eric were nowhere in sight. After about a minute, my mom and dad walked over to the table and they sat the lasagna down in the middle. We all ate silently. I was the first to speak, "Where is Maddie and Eric?" My mom sat the fork down and made sure her perfect hair still looked perfect. "They went to a concert with their friends. I would have let you go but I know that you're not into that." That was right. I wasn't a very social person. Not after... well... that's another story.

"Dad? How was work today?" I asked. Usually my mom asked but today it was different. "It was great. Thanks." I just smiled. Then out of the corner of my eye I saw moving boxes. "Are.. you guys sending me back to foster care?" I asked setting my fork down. They looked at each other and back down at their plates. "No, we aren't." My mother replied back. "What's with the boxes then?" I pointed to them. "Carlie... your father and I are getting a divorce. We aren't in love like we used to be. It just isn't the same." Divorce? My mom? The perfectionist is getting a divorce? I thought that would ruin her reputation.

"You're pregnant though..." Is all I could say. "Yes, I am pregnant. I wasn't the one that wanted this divorce Carlie." she glanced at my father. "I was having an affair." My eyes went wide. "An affair? With who? His whore of an assistant. Remember the woman who came over, had dinner with us? Went to go look at some "papers" with your father as I cleaned the kitchen? Yeah, her." my mother was now mad. Standing up and snatching her plate from the table. I didn't say a word. I remembered the woman. She looked to be about 21 and she always looked at father a little strangely... I figured there must be more than an boss/assistant relationship than they were letting on.

"So you're not going to give the baby a chance to have a father?" I asked him. My full attention was on him and I could tell that that made him uncomfortable. Half the time my parents and siblings didn't pay any attention to me, when my attention was on them however, they seemed to feel uncomfortable. "I grew up without a father. It sucked. I had women to take care of me in the orphanage. Never a father though. They tried to be a father... but it wasn't the same." I took up my plate and washed it off, put it in the dishwasher and gave him the dirtiest look I could possibly give him. "That child," I pointed to my mother. "Is yours. Yours. It belongs to you dad. Now... I think that she shouldn't know who you are. You aren't who any of us thought you were. Even when you didn't notice me, I thought it was just because of where I came from, not who I am. I realize now that you were just a piece of crap." I looked at my mother then my father and stalked up to my room.

I slammed the door and sat on the bed. This was one of those things I couldn't change. This was what it was like living like Carlie Marie Knight.