All the Broken Pieces

1.1

ARIA

I never thought I would feel like this again. I thought after Dad and Toby, the universe might feel a little sympathy for me and give me a true shot at happiness. But no. The universe decided it wanted to screw me over and break me all over again. But this time, no one would be there to pick up all my broken pieces.

My phone buzzes from across the room for what feels like the thousandth time today. I don't even bother to look because I already know who it is. Archer has been texting me non-stop, trying to apologize to me. But I stopped reading them after the first few.

I slowly get up from my permanent spot on my bed and slowly shuffle over to my bedroom door. I look down to find an untouched plate piled high with comfort food. Tons of chocolate and chips scattered on the plate look perfectly imperfect on the plate. I don't even want to eat. Not now, not ever. The thought of food makes me sick to my stomach.

I don't even want to go on. I don't want to live to see tomorrow. I want to die. I don't want to live like this anymore. I want to be able to live my life like a normal person. But I'm far from normal. I was never normal in the first place, but now I will definitely never be able to be normal.

Archer was always there to block the bad thoughts, but now he's not. He wasn't just my boyfriend, he was my best friend. My protector. He protected me from the bad thoughts. He helped me be happy again. He helped to lessen the pain of losing Toby and my Dad. And now, he isn't here. He never will be. He gave up on me. I wanted too much from him and he didn't like that, so he ran off with someone else. I can understand that. I forgive him. Who would want to be with a girl this broken anyways?

I crawl back into my bed and settle down. I close my eyes, but I don't fall asleep. I just lay there.

••••••••••••••••

I finish stringing up the "Happy Birthday, Toby" banner and head over to where my mother stands at the food and refreshments table. We're currently at Makray's waiting on Toby and my Dad to get here. My dad took Toby into town to pick out his special birthday present and they took a little too long and now they are late.

"Mom, when are Toby and Dad going to get here? I'm starting to get worried." I say. She turns to face me and chuckles at my worried expression.

"Aria, let me be the one to worry. I'm the parent, remember? You don't need wrinkles at your age, you still have to find someone to trick into marrying you. And I'm sure they're fine. They should be here soon. They're taking a shortcut through an old road near the Harris' old cabin. Don't worry, honey."

"I sigh in agreement and turn around to find Archer and Amber. I spot them sitting in a booth near the back and I begin to move over to them. As I open my mouth to speak to them, I hear the most awful sound. I turn around to find my mother being held up by some close family friends. Her face has an utter look of horror and devastation. Her glance is cast towards the TV in the corner next to the counter. I look up and immediately crumple to the floor. On the television is an aerial view of a car wreck near the old Harris cabin. The car on the TV is barely recognizable, but to my family, anyone who has ever seen my Dad's treasured vintage Impala would know who it belonged to. It looks like a scene straight out of a movie. Devastation. Heartbreak. Death.

My throat tightens up as those words enter my mind. Death. Are they dead? Are they safe? Will I ever see my dad or brother again? I begin to cry as I think about them being dead. I never really thought about death. Especially not any of my family's deaths. I feel someone grab onto my shoulder and haul me up from the ground.

I have become hysterical. Screaming curses to the world and bawling my eyes out. But I turn around to find Archer holding onto me tight. Amber soon joins him and they both hold me close while I'm falling apart.

••••••••••••••••••

I sit up in bed and begin to scream. I feel the hot tears rolling down my cheeks as my mother bursts into the room. She spots me and rushes to me. She immediately wraps her arms around my shaking body and rocks me back and forth. I feel another tear hit me on the shoulder and I know it does not belong to me. I loosen my grip on my mother to see her face. She looks even worse than I do, and that doesn't even explain the look on her face. She looks completely broken, like I'm the only one keeping her from falling apart.

Before I can even say anything, she pulls me into her strong embrace and we both cry. I don't know how long we sit there, just holding onto each other and falling apart, but by the time we realize it, it has already gotten dark outside.

For the rest of the night, we sit there, talking. Talking like we used to. We haven't been talking like we used to, so we caught up with each other. We haven't been as involved in each other's lives since I started going back to school because we just haven't had the chance to talk with each other. And that's just what we do. Talk. For the rest of the night.

••••••••••••••••••••

AMBER

I'm numb. Entirely numb. The pain has faded to a slight tingling feeling. James continues to hit me repeatedly, screaming profanities.

"Why the hell would you even look in his fucking direction? You stupid bitch! I do everything for you, and this is how you repay me? Slutting it up for Phoenix? All you are is a stupid piece of fucking trash! Worthless whore!"

All I did was help Phoenix out. He was drunk off his ass and couldn't function properly enough to make it somewhere he could rest. All I did was help him into the basement where James room is, and Phoenix just started telling me about his "plan". Every single bit of it.

All of a sudden, James stops. His eyes are red and puffy, and just a slight bit dilated. He's drunk. So drunk. And I'm stuck with him in this state. This isn't even as bad as it gets. He gets so much worse.

He turns around and leaves me laying there, alone. I'm left to my own, dark, consuming thoughts. Alone.