Neighbourhood...

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by TypicalWordsmith

by TypicalWordsmith

I live in an... interesting neighbourhood. So many different types of people, so many people who get on my nerves. I really should give them a chance but with neighbours like these... Who needs enemies?

1****

People mowing their lawn... I'm fine with people who mow their lawn.... but... NOT AT 8AM! Bloody hell. What's worse is that they do it on the weekends. Who the hell even wakes up at 8am anyway on Saturdays and Sundays? Well the answer would be me! Since I have no choice because their lawn mowers are so bloody loud. At such early hours those machines sound even louder than jackhammers. This is one of the reasons why I hate cutting grass myself. Even though I do it in the afternoons I still feel like such a jerk while doing it.

2****

Cheap bastard neighbours... I dread opening the door because of these guys."Do you have a couple of eggs?", "Do you have any baking powder?", "Do you have garlic?"... You have no idea how many times my neighbours have asked me those questions. I have a strong urge to just yell out "Yes I do! But you're not getting any!" but I do have to live with these bastards, so I might as well treat them nicer. Why can't they buy it themselves? It would be alright if they ask me a couple of times but they ask me at least 3 times a week! I'm not made out of money you know!? I wish I was though... Actually I don't because then they would be asking for cash instead.

3****

The people living above me... These guys make my life a living hell. They are too damn noisy. They play the drums everyday... The same beat. Over and over and over again. They've been playing for 3 years now and they still sound the same as when they first started. There's this girl who sings along with her favourite songs. I'm pretty sure that she thinks that no one can hear her but I can hear her clearly... If I hear her singing that bloody milkshake song one more time I will jump off the top floor of my building and I'm taking her with me. Every few minutes I hear footsteps above... What on earth are they doing? Tap dancing? It's like they're running laps or something. I wish I lived above them. Then they would be begging for forgiveness.

4****

Idiots doing burnouts in the middle of the night... These bastards have been watching too much Fast and The Furious. I can't stand hearing the sound of people doing burnouts. I should tie them up and run my fingernails against a blackboard. They always leave a burnt rubber smell which leaves me paranoid since I think that my computer is overheating. Why do they even bother doing it at night? They can't see anything... Also what's the point? Do they think that girls are going to be staring out their windows thinking "Who is that handsome guy in the car doing those sick burnouts? I am so in love with that guy"... Only in their bloody dreams!

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Someone told me that my rants were a bit boring... that comment almost made me cry... Just kidding! It didn't almost make me cry... It DID make me cry.