Life Without Ash. (Slow Updates)

Part Four

Life Without Ash: Day Five

Life's been... A rollercoaster for the most part. I couldn't help it. Ash was my self-confidence. She always made me stick up for myself when I thought I couldn't... And I couldn't these past two days...

Someone asked me if I ever dranked, smoked, or chewed. I said no. I'm better then that, I knew I was... But Ash reminded me that I was and right now I thought I wasn't.

I couldn't ever smoke because I have breathing problems do to allergies and chewing was just gross to everyone at our school. My so called "friends" had a beer with them and I just took a swig. They pressured me to much... So I guess I said yes.

I just have no self-confidence and I need to change that. Granted, I will never go to counciling for it because there's to many mental problems of myself that needs to be fixed but I needed help.

I can't survive without Ash. In a matter of days that swig will turn into a drug party. Just because I couldn't say no. Ash just was my confidence, my councillor, my toutor, my everything, my friend...

But now... But now it's all gone...

It's stupid really... Internet friends... I really just wish it could be back in the day when there was no phone's so I don't have to worry about this stuff. So I don't have to feel annoying when someone doesn't answer. So I don't have to worry about my media life but instead social.

I haven't really thought it much but why do I really need Ash? Sure there is self-confidence, but I eventually will gain it on my own. I guess it's because nobody else listens to me. Everyone thinks I'm annoying and they shut me off. My internet friends don't do that... And Ash is the one that talks to me back.

Flashback

"Ash's Daily Advice: Don't drink Diet Coke and drive. It makes you have a party. And you'll probably hit a bystander/pedestrian." Ash said. Now I wanted to try it, but I'm not aloud to drive yet.

"I just want to die." Ash said. Immediately I thought it was going to mean sucide or something close to it so I thought of the most appropriate first question to ask.

"Why?"

"Because I'm so tired but I cannot sleep"

"Oh. Good. I thought it was something bad." I was not thinking to well of my choice of words.

"Good? Wow considerate much?" I laughed, but as soon as I read it I had to go clean my room.

Later came and I had another message. It was a picture of a disney princess, but this princess had all of them in one. I was confused. It looked like Ariel's face but I couldn't tell.

"Ummm.... I see merida!!!And elsa! And alot of other princesses. Whats the fc? Cause it looks like ariels but idk." I texted Ash, asking her what the picture was about.

"The what?" Ash didn't know what fc meant. "Ariel's mouth and Cindy's eyes." I figured that she googled it or something and figured it out.

"Thanks. I have to say the eyebrows are probably... Rupunzles?"

"Okay, don't abbreviate face." She thought fc meant face. "It's a short word in general, bro. Don't ruin it."
"Fc is faceclaim" I said, laughing. I didn't mean to, not everyone knows what it means.

"Oh..." Ash began "I was so confused I didn't know what it was. Why is it faceclaim?" I completely facepalmed.

"Reasons why I love you. I said fc cause I didn't want to say 'Whos the face?'" I put a bunch of laughing smile faces to lighten up the mood.

"Reasons why you love me? Because I don't know what fc is?"

"Yes and it's because you thought it was short for face."

"I feel like 'who's the face?' would've been easier." I laughed. Faceclaim was easier for me, so I don't have to use so many little words. I let go of the argument and finished the rest of my room.