Chapter 5

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Chapter 5

Thankful that I had a moment to breathe, I followed behind Terry as he led me from the kitchen to the therapy room. Granted, the walk was a horribly short distance; however, I did my best to drag my feet and give myself as much of a breather as I possibly could.

It took everything in me not to just throw myself on the ground and revert back to my toddler phase, throwing a temper tantrum while refusing to walk another step farther. Sadly, I was just above that level of maturity. 

Terry waited patiently as I finally reached the closed door across the way. His brown eyes seemed sad despite how he tried to smile. “You’re doing so well, Max,” he offered me reassuringly.

I smiled up at him, barely meeting his gaze. If he knew the war that raged inside my body, he wouldn’t have thought that I was doing so well. Hell, I wanted nothing more than to rid my body of the food weighing me down, but I knew that would only make me feel worse. 

I already felt like complete and utter shit; there was no point in making myself feel worse. 

For now, the food could stay.

For now.

When I said nothing, Terry nodded gently as he opened the door and stepped aside. With a gulp, I inhaled deeply and walked through the doorway. Without as much as a good luck, the security guard shut the door, giving me no chance to flee.

Before I could even toy with that idea, Dawn emerged from her tidy desk tucked away in the corner. Her hair was in its usual tight ponytail, and her bright acrylic nails matched her large red-framed glasses. “Are you ready to get started, Max?”

Inside, my body screamed, no; however, I nodded as she placed a hand on my shoulder and led me to the plush chair in front of her desk. I had been through many therapists before, and they all treated me like this sad little creature who was too frail to stand on his own. Naturally, I expected Dawn to treat me the same or something to that respect. 

When I sat down, she made her way to her desk, pulled out a spiral notebook, the same that I used in school, and stared at me until I got stopped fidgeting and looked as comfortable as possible..

Well, as comfortable as possible considering the circumstances. 

“How’re you feeling after your first full day here, Max?”

I blinked at Dawn for a few seconds; I expected her to ask the generic tell-me-how-you-feel question. The way she spoke actually made me think she was interested in hearing what I had to say.

Truthfully, it was a little disarming, but I wasn’t quite ready to spill my guts to this woman just yet.

“Overwhelming,” I replied honestly. 

She wrote in her notebook very quickly then met my eyes once more. “Can I get you to elaborate?”

I involuntarily sighed at her question. And the shrink bullshit starts, my mind hissed.

When I didn’t speak, Dawn said something that truly struck me. “Max, I know that you’ve been through a string of counselors and psychiatrists by now; I know that you think I’m going to sit up here and ask you questions like “How does that make you feel?” and “Can you please elaborate?”. I’m not like the rest of them. Believe me when I tell you that.”

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