Kay's Diaries (Louis Tomlinson)

First Entry: The Louis Project

These are short entries. This one happens when Louis and Kay meet, back then in chapter 39 of Music Sheet.

Bel, xx

Dedication to my friend Lily. Happy birthday! I remembered! You see? I know it's tomorrow, but anyways. Happy 14th birthday!

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First Entry: The Louis Project

Dear Diary,

This is the first and last time I start this… uh… entries? Whatever. It’s the first and last time I start one of these like this. How cheesy and overused, but I couldn’t think of anything else. To be honest, I’ve started this to keep track of a new –let’s call it project– I got interested in. So this will be my journal. That’s better, saying diary sounds too childish for me.

Anyways, I met a guy. Yeah, I know, I always meet new guys, that’s nothing new and it’s not oh-my-God-I-met-this-guy-and-fell-in-love-at-first-sight-with-him type of I met a guy. It’s… different. His name is Louis and he is in this band called One Direction. Yeah, the same boyband that everyone seems to be talking about. They are all nice and really talented, beautiful voices and they are all fun to be around. All except Louis. He is a total jerk.

He has major issues.

Apparently, he had a bad breakup and he is channelling all his frustration into a full hatred for all the female population. He hates us all, with burning passion and I find that quite funny, to be honest. He seems like the kind of guy everyone wants to be away from, but not me. I see more than his hatred. When I look at him and the way he burns with rage, I see loneliness. It’s like his eyes are screaming for help, for someone to reach him. Crazy, uh? Everything he says is to push people away, but deep inside, he is hurt and lonely, and he doesn’t want to be like that.

I have this theory. I think he says he hates all women and acts this bitter just so he doesn’t have to be sad. Some people say it’s easier to cope with rage than to feel pain. I believe in that and I believe Louis is doing exactly that.

That’s why I’ve made him my project. Yes, I’ve called this the Louis Project. I’m determined to break his shell and made him get over this stage his is in. I didn’t meet the old Louis, but I’ve talked to Harry and he told me many things. Grimmy also shared a bit of info he had about Tomlinson, but I want to know this joker guy, the one with the Peter Pan complex, the one that always made everyone laugh and who got along with the girls without a problem.

I’m not in love with him, and I don’t think I’ll ever be, but I must confess he is hot and I wouldn’t mind having something with him. Maybe we can have an affair and after that, after I fix him, he can go and look for the right girl for him. I’m not the one that looks for a commitment; I’m not the type that wants a serious relationship. I don’t want a forever, I want fun and I want to help him.

Why?

I have no idea, I just feel like I’m the one who can really help him out and he needs help. A lot of help. And what can I say? Sometimes I have my moments. There are days when I do help old ladies to cross the street, or when I give money to a homeless man. Today, I met Louis and I had another of my moments and I decided to help him out.

However, I know it won’t be easy. This guy is as stubborn as a mule. And I’m not exaggerating. He insulted me, though I don’t mind. I learnt long time ago that insults only mean something if I let them get to me, and I never do. So no matter what he says, he can’t make me feel inferior.

Maybe that’s the reason why I’m the right one to help him. Because no matter how mean things he says to me, nothing will make me feel bad or make me cry. His words will never touch me, but not everyone is like this, even less other girls.

So I’ll show Louis that not all women are the same, I’ll make him get over this and move on. He will thank me later.

And that’s it. I’ll keep track of how this project goes on. Wow, I feel like a scientist doing a research. I guess in a way I’m one. Who would have thought that? Me? A scientist? What now, Mr Benson? Do you feel bad for making me take Biology three times?

Anyways, peace out! (this is cheesy too. I need another way to finish theses too).

Kay x