TRIGGER WARNING: Mention of Self Harm, Mention of suicidal thoughts
November 10th
Me: Can you come pick me up?
Me: I need you. I really need you right now.
Read at 10:00 AM
...
Jacob sat on his porch waiting for Mincheol. Ten minutes later he finally arrived. This meant he left as soon as he saw the text because he lived about ten minutes away.
"Jacob, I got your text, are you ok?" He said rushing over. Then he saw the blood stain on Jacob's sleeve. Without asking he rolled it up. He saw the bandaid that Jacob had put over his wound. He pulled Jacob into a tight hug.
"What happened?" He asked, about to cry.
" Can we leave first?" Jacob whispered. He didn't want anyone else to know what he did.
"Of course." He said, taking his hand and guiding him to the car. Once they made it to Mincheol's house they curled up on his couch, cuddling underneath huge fuzzy blankets. Mincheol Stroked Jacob's hair as they watched Bluey. Jacob was finally ready to talk.
"I cut myself. My parents yelled at me and I couldn't handle it anymore. They were like Pakiusap anak. We know you are better than this." He said imitating their tagalog. " But I just completely spiraled thinking that no one could possibly love me and that I wasn't good enough at anything. I wanted to kill myself. But I didn't. I thought of all our friends and how badly my death would effect them."
Mincheol was now crying. He was at a loss for words and all he could do was hug Jacob. This was an issue far out of Mincheol's hands.
"Please please call me if you ever feel like this again. I will do everything in my power to make you feel better." He whispered into Jacob's ear. They were now both beginning to tear up. He could feel Jacob shaking in his arms.
Jacob was starting to drift off when Mincheol said, " How about you stay the night tonight and we skip school tomorrow. I understand if you don't wanna go home. My mom leaves to early in the morning to know and my sister's are good at secrets."
Jacob nodded and as he began to fall asleep again, Mincheol picked him up and carried him to his bed. Mincheol covered Jacob completely with the covers just in case his mom came in his room for whatever reason.
The next morning when Jacob woke up, Mincheol was already out of bed talking to his sister about their master plan. Then he followed Mincheol into the dinning room and wat he'd as he filled out the absent form, after logging successfully into his mom's account. Apparently she had told him to do this anytime he needed a sick day, since she left too early in the morning to fill it out for him. As soon as his sister's left they were free to plan out their day.
" Here is my idea, I take you to the mall and spoil you rotten. We go wherever you want and we can buy whatever you want and eat anything you crave." Mincheol explained.
"Are you sure you'd do all that just for me? The mall is like 30 minutes away!" Jacob pointed out.
" Of course! What kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn't try to cheer you up!" Mincheol smiled and gave him a hug. Jacob responded with a kiss on the cheek.
The car ride felt significantly shorter than Jacob anticipated. Driving through the cold fall flatlands of Illinois would normally be boring, but he had Mincheol. Minnie was playing all his favorite, Seventeen songs on his CD player, on full volume. Jacob wondered if Seventeen was all he listened to. Jacob squeezed the giant frog squish mello in Mincheol's car, while they shouted the lyrics at the top of their lungs.
The mall was basically in the middle of no where. It was surrounded by dead farm land towards the end of fall. Jacob could see nothing but the plowed land for miles. He wondered why they would ever want to put a strip mall here.
They first went to an old book store. It was gigantic, filled with all sorts of nerdy shit, not just books. The two of them ran over to the section filled with comic books and funko pops. Mincheol found a Bilbo Baggins keychain funko pop while Jacob was knee deep into the Spider-Man comics.
"Have you ever noticed how queer coded spider man is? I mean he's a teenager who has to hide half of himself from the world. And he has to be careful who he tells cause some people may not accept him. I still am convinced Gwen Stacy is a trans women too. Because I say so." Jacob began to hyperfixate. He made Mincheol laugh.
They ended up buying a the first heartstopper book and Gender Queer. Both books were queer graphic novels. After the book store, they got slushies then made their way over to the Music Store. At the Music Store Mincheol was quickly immersed in the kpop section. He found a carat version of Attacca, a Seventeen album, and it was labeled Joshua. This was the only thing Mincheol bought for himself today.
Jacob messed around with the records. He put on a queen record and when Good Old Fashion Lover Boy started to play he took Mincheol by the hands and started to dance. They both jumped around like complete maniacs. They didn't care that they looked like idiots, the store was empty except for them and the employees!
After their little dance break, Jacob went over to the section with instruments and took a shiny new clarinet off it's stand. Mincheol bought him a box of new reeds. Then Jacob began to play Light A Flame by Seventeen, which he learned just for Mincheol.
Once they left the Music Store they went across the street to the thrift store. They played a cute little game where they picked out outfits for eachother then tried them on. Jacob picked out a very 70's looking outfit, completely with floral pants. Jacob thought Mincheol looked silly but cute as hell in the outfit.
Mincheol picked out a very preppy formal looking outfit for his boyfriend. It was a polo, khakis and a sweater tied around his shoulders. Neither of them could stop laughing. It was the exact opposite of what Jacob would wear. Jacob ended up picking out a very emo outfit for himself. From that outfit, Mincheol bought him the oversized MCR shirt and a trans pin that said "He/Him" on it.
Overall their day was a complete success helped to completely distract Jacob from his parents. He missed 20 calls from them that day. They were probably worried sick about him the whole time. Nearly a hundred texts were from his Mother apologizing and asking where he was and when he would be home. Jacob almost cried seeing them all.
Mincheol decided to take Jacob to the woods to finish the day.
"We'll figure out what to do about your parents in exactly an hour. But for now let's focus on finishing your day off strong." Then he got close to Jacob's ear and whispered. " You are loved and supported and I will do anything to make you feel wanted on this earth because you are. I not only want you alive and in my life but I need you."
He wiped away Jacob's tears, after he began to cry. Mincheol held Jacob tightly until they crying stopped. He pulled out his phone and started playing imperfect love by Seventeen. For the second time that day, they danced. This time it was a slow dance. They swayed as they held eachother close. In that moment it was just Mincheol and Jacob. Nothing else mattered. Jacob wasn't thinking about his mom. He wasn't worried about the trouble he would be in. He wasn't having any suicidal thoughts either.
Mincheol kissed him on the forehead when the song ended. They trailed back up to Mincheol's Jeep, where he proceeded to take Jacob back home. He planned to stay there in case Jacob's parents yelled at him, but Jacob wouldn't let him.
"I don't want you to get in trouble too." Jacob explained.
