Confessions of a Teenage Caffeine Addict

36 // Hi, Pretty

Moving on doesn't mean you forget about things.

It just means you have to accept what happened and continue living.

—Erza Scarlet

____________________________________

JAKE

MARCH

7:30am and I was awake, which wasn't too bad. I bent down and scooped Emma out of her crib, her blue footy-PJS all bunched up in the wrong places.

"Dada," she greeted me with a smile, pink elephant and all.

"Hi, buddy," I smoothed some of her brown curls back and fixed her tiny clothes. "You slept late this morning."

Emma's response was to stick her thumb in her mouth and snuggle into me. I made my way into the kitchen and made myself a cup of coffee. She reached towards it.

"Hot." I pointed at the coffee. Emma looked up at me. "Hot," I repeated as we sat down at the dining room table.

"Aw, Jake, I would have gotten her, sweetie," Mom said to me as she turned the next page in the newspaper.

I was kind of shocked they still had the newspaper delivered, but at the same time it was also nice. It reminded me of weekends when I was little, before technology was relevant. I would wake up, run into the kitchen and both of my parents would be reading the newspaper and drinking their coffee. Then Dad would make waffles, eggs, and bacon. After that, I would either have a hockey game to go to or I would grab my gear and run down to meet the guys at the pond or in the street if it wasn't winter.

"It's okay, I was awake anyways." I snapped out of my minor flashback to a simpler time.

"Hi, Pretty," Mom said to Emma rubbing her leg.

"Hi, Pretty," Emma repeated before looking away. Since Emma started talking, that was about the only thing she would repeat. She hadn't started asking "why" yet, or anything like that. Just, 'hi, Pretty.'

"Is Grandma pretty?" I asked Emma as Mom opened a yogurt for her.

Emma stared at Mom for a minute, taking her in: happy eyes, warm smile, loving arms; and then she looked up at me and nodded.

"Grandma is pretty?" Mom asked, grabbing one of Emma's feet and her excited laughter filled the room.

"So pretty." I told Emma who laughed some more. "Sooooo pretty."

"Thinking about the game tonight?" Mom asked before trying to feel Emma a spoonful of yogurt, who had other things in mind and pushed the yogurt away.

"I'm ready." I nodded.

"You should do some yoga. Get nice and relaxed, and loose," Mom said as I took a sip of my coffee.

"Yeah that's a good idea. I think I will."

"Any word from J-U-L-E-S?" she spelled out Jules's name.

"Nope." I tried not to frown at Emma, who had seemingly been abandoned by her own mother without so much as a goodbye or second thought.

I don't think Mom knew what to say because she just pursed her lips together before shaking her head. Same, Mom. Same. "Have you tried calling her?"

"A million and three times."

"Texting?" she tried to grasp at and idea. Something. Anything I might not have thought of.

I nodded. "I've been down every single avenue, every social media platform. Nothing. No response." I rested my chin on Emma's head. "She doesn't want her anymore," I said. "She doesn't want us." Emma's little fingers wrapped around my larger finger.